in about five minutes, please?
We'll have a table
in a few moments.
Excuse me.
Give us a bottle
of your finest champagne...
five shrimp cocktails
and some bread for my brother.
We have a Dom Pйrignon '71
at $120.
That'll be fine, pal.
Seriously, the food here is really
expensive. The soup is fucking $10!
Let's go outside.
I'll buy you a cup of coffee.
We're putting the band
back together.
- Forget it. No way.
- We're on a mission from God.
Hold it. Hold it.
What's this?
Waiter? Sir?
Please, waiter?
Yes, sir? How are your salads?
The salads are fine.
It's just that we'd like
to move to another table...
away from those two gentlemen.
Why? Have they been
disturbing you?
No. It's just that...
Well, frankly,
they're offensive-smelling.
I mean, they smell bad.
Excuse me. I'll see if I can locate
another table for you.
Thank you.
Wrong glass, sir.
How much for the little girl?
- The women? How much for the women?
- What?
I want to buy your women.
Your little girl. Your daughters.
Sell them to me.
- Sell me your children.
- Maitre d'!
Cut it out. The owners are gonna
ask me to call the cops.
- You wouldn't do that to me, would you?
- He just got outta Joliet.
He's on parole. You can't
call the cops on him, man.
- We're putting the band back together.
- I said no.
Absolutely not!
How much for your wife?
We're putting the band back together.
We need you, man. We need your horn.
I really can't.
We got everybody except
Matt "Guitar" Murphy and Blue Lou.
- We're getting them next.
- No way.
If you say no, Elwood and I
will come here for breakfast...
lunch and dinner
every day of the week.
Okay. I'll play.
You got me.
Sir?
White men!
White women!
The swastika is calling you!
The sacred and ancient symbol
of your race...
since the beginning of time.
The Jew is using the black...
as muscle against you.
And you are left there, helpless.
- Fuck you!
- What are you gonna do about it, whity?
- Just sit there?
- Go back where you came from!
Of course not!
- Son of a bitch!
- You are going to join...
with us...
the members of...
the American Socialist
White People's Party:
an organization of decent...
law-abiding white folk...
just like you.
Go to hell, bastards!
Go to hell!
I pledge allegiance to Adolf Hitler...
the immortal leader of our race.
To the order for which he stands.
One great cause.
Sacred and invincible.
Hey, what's going on?
Those bums won their court case
so they're marching today.
- What bums?
- The fucking Nazi party.
Illinois Nazis.
I hate Illinois Nazis.
Heil Hitler!
Ten-hut!
- Gruppenfuehrer!
- Yes, sir!
Get that car's license plate number.
We're gonna kill
that son of a bitch.
Come on home, babe
Oh, come on home, woman
Oh, come on home, pretty baby
I love you
When she walk that walk
And talk that talk
And whisper in my ear
Tell me that she love me
I love that talk
That baby talk
When she talk like that
I can't take it like that
Come on home to me, baby
Walk your walk
Talk your talk
Talk your talk, baby
Thank you, ladies and gentlemen.
That was "Boom, Boom",
a song that I wrote back in the '50s.
- No, you didn't.
- It was a hit.
- No, you didn't.
- Yes, I did.
I wrote "Boom, Boom"!
I wrote "Boom, Boom"!
- Can I help you, boys?
- You got any white bread?
Yes.
I'll have some
toasted white bread, please.
You want butter or jam
on that toast, honey?
No, ma'am. Dry.
- Got any fried chicken?
- Best damn chicken in the state.
Bring me four fried chickens
and a Coke.
You want chicken wings
or chicken legs?
Four fried chickens and a Coke.
And some dry white toast, please.
You all want anything to drink
with that?
- No, ma'am.
- A Coke.
Be up in a minute.
We got two honkies out there
dressed like Hasidic diamond merchants.
- Say what?
- They look like they're from the CIA.
-