Prize winner.
Who blew me?
- Yeah, like I'd know.
- Sorry.
Lose the shoes, and pick again.
You didn't tell me this shit was about music.
- Well, it is Band Camp, moron.
- Hey, to be fair...
maybe we should just give him a head start.
All right. Yeah.
Okay, all right. All right. 
What's wrong with you?
Scared to show off the mosquito bites?
I've matured since the fourth grade, Matt.
Have you?
Oh, I've got 10 pounds of dangling maturity
right here, Leesy.
- Quit calling me that.
- Okay, okay, moving on.
- Matt, just pick another question, please.
- All right, screw it. Whatever.
There you go. Suck on that.
- Fourth and Long.
- Sure, no problem.
Of Beethoven's major symphonies,
which has the longest fourth movement?
All right, I see where this is going.
Fine, you win.
I free ball, ladies.
Got to let the big boys breathe.
All right, we play by my rules now.
Football questions only.
Prepare to strip, ladies.
- Wait. But first, does anybody want a beer?
- I do. 
The counselors have a secret stash
in the fridge across the hall.
- Would you mind?
- Now we're talking about a fucking party.
Stiffy'll be back in a jiffy.
I mean, there's nobody around...
and we haven't seen your best side yet.
Yes! We got him.
So busted.
Man, big boys, wake up.
Just gotta turn down the A.C. In there, huh?
Good night, girls.
Sorry, asshole, game's over.
Yeah, the big boys
will love the long walk home.
Room check, girls.
Oh, shit.
- Ditch his clothes.
- Out the window.
All right, who wants a long neck?
Nurse Sanders.
- They set me up.
- He attacked us with pepper spray...
- and ruined our graduation.
- I went there for a friendly game...
Hold it. Hold it. Kids.
Okay...
where are your clothes?
I have them.
- May I ask why?
- Well, they got me naked...
- Oh, whatever. He took his own pants off...
- And they stole my clothes.
And I got stuck up there
with Mrs. Doubtfire checking out my...
Let me see if I have this straight.
Elyse, you think Matt is an arrogant jock
who wears his penis on his forehead...
just to gain the approval of
his sociopathic brother.
And Matt, you think Elyse
is an uptight, geeky prude...
who needs to loosen up and get laid.
Excuse the expression, dear.
Is that close to being on the money?
Look, kids...
the only way to solve your differences...
is by working together.
So why don't you start tomorrow...
by putting one foot in front of the other?
Left flank hut.
Turn and hut.
What the fuck!
Band 10 hut!
Holy shit.
When I yell "band 10 hut,"
you snap firmly at attention.
- You want to see me firmly at attention?
- I already have. I wasn't impressed.
Look...
we've never beaten Beechwood, okay?
For some of us, it's our last shot.
Just stop screwing up, okay?
Yeah, asshole.
Okay, people, back to work, let's go.
Whatever.
I don't need this shit.
Reset the block. Front ranks, right here.
Housekeeping.
Oscar, brought me something to drink?
- Come on.
- Good looking out, baby.
Hey, it's Ernie Crapowitz.
So you finally came out of the closet.
Good for you.
Look, I want to know
what goes on at night, all right?
All the crazy shit.
Naked pillow fights, whatever.
Do I look like the guy that's in charge of
the naked pillow fights, huh?
It's my first time here.
Notice the beanie?
Yes.
Yes, I do.
Yes, speaking of beanies,
where's yours, Stifler?
You still not following the rules, huh?
- Let's see.
- Look. He's getting in trouble again.
No standard-issue Tall Oaks T-shirt
and no beanie.
I believe that's two points from Great Falls,
Mr. Nelson.
Tell you what, Vande-cramp...
what if I took his beanie...
and put it on my weenie?
How do you like that Vande-cramp?
It's on my head, right?
Make it five points from Great Falls.
Five points.
Man, this place sucks donkey ass.
Put your beanie on, Son.
Five points.
Stay still. Stop moving.
He ain't going nowhere now.
This isn't your world. This is our
world,