it's for you.
Who is it ?
It's uh ...
harry.
Harry, who ?
Hairy melmacian.
Oh ...
right.
Make it quick,
okay ?
I want to call
my insurance agent.
Maybe it's not too late
to get a homeowner's policy.
Hello, harry.
Hi, "too-Much-Rouge."
How is it going ?
Fine.I've met a lot
of nice new people ...
Who want to kill me.
That's nice.
I'm glad you're
taking it so well.
I can't talk now.
We have company.
Oh, you invited people over.
I wouldn't want you to stop
living because i might.
We didn't invite them.
They just dropped by.
Well, excuse us
for being under siege.
Uh ...
Willie hasn't forgotten.
We'll see you soon.
Okay, harry ?
Do i have the
right number ?
Yes.Good bye.
Do i use
too much rouge ?
I always thought so.
Sir, the swat team will
be here in 5 minutes.
What's taking
so long ?
They stormed the wrong
house by mistake.
In 5 minutes, this place
will be raining burglar.
Tanner, come back !
Fire at will !
No, no !
Hold your fire !
Sorry.I thought
i was back in 'nam.
Who are you ?
Oh, willie, willie.
I'm so glad to see you.
It's okay, alf.
What's your plan ?
I don't
have a plan.
There are enough people
here without a plan,
right guys ?
Absolutely.
You said it.
We're sunk.
Alf, we've got
to do something.
Wrap me
around your neck ...
And tell them
i'm a fur stole.
Hey,
i'm not married
to that idea.
Testing, testing.
Can you hear me ?
Yeah, i can hear you,
But this is no time
to play "block captain."
No, alf,
i've got it !
I've got an idea.
All we need is a place
for you to hide.
How about jamaica, mon ?
Just give me
a minute.
[ Police ]
this is your last chance.
Come out with your hands up.
I'm telling you, coppers,
you'll never take me alive.
Ha !
What a stupid threat.
Get in the hamper.
But raquel's
unmentionables
are in there.
Just get in
the hamper !
And keep making those
silly demands on your
walkie-Talkie.
Forget it.
If you don't
surrender immediately,
We are firing
tear gas.
Teartear
gas !Teargas!
Gas !
I'm getting in before
they start to harmonize.
This will
either work, or --
Let's not think
about that.
Whoa !How bad
does tear gas smell ?
Get down.
Did i mention that
i'm claustrophobic ?
I am !
Don't shoot !
He's not here.
Hold your fire.
I don't want to hear
anything from you, lady.
We're coming in.
Upstairs.
The burglar's
just not here.
He's got to be here.
The place is surrounded.
[ Alf on radio ]
here are my demands ...
Down !
 I want a million dollars,
 And a dc-10 with those
little bags of peanuts;
The honey-Roasted kind.
The voice is coming
from this walkie-Talkie.
He's not in
the house.
He's been broadcasting his
demands over the walkie-Talkie.
He must have escaped
before we got here.
For the in-Flight meal,
i want the filet mignon.
I'll have chicken.
Fish.Kosher for me.
Oy !
How did that goofball come up
with such a clever plan ?
Oh, you really
think it's clever ?
No burglar; no hostages.
We found a bunch
of bank pens, though.
Can i keep these ?
Take them out to
the car as evidence.
Okay.
And i'll turn
back the clock.
He's probably still in the area.
Search the neighborhood.
Tanner !
Thanks for
all your help.
You've got
a lot of guts.
You deserve to be
block captain.
Thank you, sir,
and good bye.
I'll just tidy up.
Alf, you're safe now.
[ Gasp ]
[ Crash ]
Just blame that
on the burglar.
Down !I have to
carry you home.
This hamper isn't
jamaica, mon.
Get down, mon.
Hi, trevor, raquel.
What are you doing
with our laundry ?
I thought i'd wash it.
It's the least i can do
after all you've been through.
Thanks, willie.
Let's hear it for
willie tanner !
Willie !Willie !
Thank you.
[ Alf ]
psst - Don't stop to
sign any autographs, mon.
I hear you, mon.
Willie !Willie !
Hey alf, what
are you doing ?
I'm putting the
finishing touches