Push her down the stairs! Push her down the stairs! Push her down the stairs!
C'mon Daddy, listen to me!
It's like, it's like, all of my life, everyone has always told me,
'You're a shoe! You're a shoe, you're a shoe, you're a shoe!'.
And today I just stopped and I said, 'What if I don't wanna be a shoe?
What if I wanna be a- a purse, y'know? Or a- or a hat!
No, I'm not saying I want you to buy me a hat, I'm saying I am a ha-
It's a metaphor, Daddy!
You can see where he'd have trouble.
Look Daddy, it's my life.
Well maybe I'll just stay here with Monica.
Well, I guess we've established who's staying here with Monica...
Well, maybe that's my decision.
Well, maybe I don't need your money.
Wait!! Wait, I said maybe!!
Just breathe, breathe.. that's it.
Just try to think of nice calm things...
Raindrops on roses
and rabbits and kittens,
bluebells and sleighbells and- something with mittens...
La la la la... something and noodles with string.  These are a few...
I'm all better now.
I helped!
Okay, look, this is probably for the best, y'know?
Independence. Taking control of your life.
The whole, 'hat' thing.
And hey, you need anything, you can always come to Joey.
Me and Chandler live across the hall.
And he's away a lot.
Joey, stop hitting on her! It's her wedding day!
What, like there's a rule or something?
Please don't do that again, it's a horrible sound.
It's, uh, it's Paul.
Oh God, is it 6:30?  Buzz him in!
- Who's Paul?
- Paul the Wine Guy, Paul?
- Maybe.
- Wait. Your 'not a real date' tonight is with Paul the Wine Guy?
- He finally asked you out?
- Yes!
Ooh, this is a Dear Diary moment.
Rach, wait, I can cancel...
Please, no, go, that'd be fine!
Are, are you okay? I mean, do you want me to stay?
That'd be good...
- Really?
- No, go on! It's Paul the Wine Guy!
What does that mean?   Does he sell it,
drink it, or just complain a lot?
Hi, come in! Paul, this is..
... everybody, everybody, this is Paul.
Hey! Paul! Hi! The Wine Guy! Hey!
I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name. Paul, was it?
Okay, umm-umm, I'll just--I'll be right back, I just gotta go ah, go ah...
A wandering?
Change!  Okay, sit down. Two seconds.
Ooh, I just pulled out four eyelashes. That can't be good.
Hey, Paul!
Yeah?
Here's a little tip, she really likes it when you rub her neck in the same spot
over and over and over again until it starts to get a little red.
Shut up, Joey!
So Rachel, what're you, uh... what're you up to tonight?
Well, I was kinda supposed to be headed for Aruba on my honeymoon, so nothing!
Right, you're not even getting your honeymoon, God..
No, no, although, Aruba, this time of year... talk about your-
-big lizards...
Anyway, if you don't feel like being alone tonight,
Joey and Chandler are coming over to help me put together my new furniture.
Yes, and we're very excited about it.
Well actually thanks, but I think I'm just gonna hang out here tonight.
It's been kinda a long day.
Okay, sure.
Hey Pheebs, you wanna help?
Oh, I wish I could, but I don't want to.
Love is sweet as summer showers,
love is a wondrous work of art,
but your love oh your love,
your love...
is like a giant pigeon...crapping on my heart.
La-la-la-la-la- Thank you.
La-la-la-la...ohhh!
I'm supposed to attach a brackety thing to the side things, using a bunch of these little worm guys.
I have no brackety thing, I see no whim guys whatsoever and-
I cannot feel my legs.
- I'm thinking we've got a bookcase here.
- It's a beautiful thing.
What's this?
I would have to say that is an 'L'-shaped bracket.
- Which goes where?
- I have no idea.
Done with the bookcase!
All finished!
This was Carol's favorite beer.
She always drank it out of the can, I should have known.
Hey-hey-hey-hey,
if you're gonna start with that stuff we're outta here.
Yes, please don't spoil all this fun.
Ross, let me ask you a question.
She got the furniture, the stereo, the good TV-
what did you get?
- You