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it out too clearly,
because there was...
...this bright glow.
He had this white cloud
all around him.
Finally I could make out a head.
He has a large head.
Sure, he's God.
Then finally the cloud disappeared...
...and I heard this voice say...
Holy shit! Jeez, that's us.
Ordinary citizens putting up
their dukes and slugging it out.
Indeed, shooting it out
with violent criminals.
That's heroism. Or is it?
This station manager thinks...
...it is reckless
and potentially fatal stupidity.
What?
Jeopardizing the lives
of innocent people...
...is an act of hotshots, not heroes.
Hotshots?
Criminals must be stopped,
but by our capable police force...
...not hotshots armed only
with dumb luck.
Dumb luck?
This is a Channel 6 Editorial.
Opposing viewpoints welcome.
Opposing viewpoints?
Here's your opposing viewpoint,
you video dipshit.
Take it easy, Donald.
He hardly ever acts like this.
"Take it easy"? He made idiots of us.
I am sure no one who matters
watches the 5:00 news.
Forget it.
He was doing his job.
We should go down there
and give a rebuttal.
I think it's mandatory.
He's got a right to his opinion.
Besides, I think the holdup guy...
...knows that I saw his face.
Yeah, I know he knows that.
What, are you afraid?
Yes.
All right, I won't get involved.
That's fine.
Great movies all this week on
Channel 6. Monday, Billy Jack...
Good evening, baby.
Hi, Poppy. How'd it go? Did you
find a new place for the station?
No, not yet.
It shouldn't be too hard
to rebuild the old one.
I didn't exactly tell you the truth
about my relocating, Candice.
I didn't want you to worry.
- It worked. I wasn't worried at all.
- You're old enough for the truth.
Just remember that things
always happen for the best, okay?
Now I'm worried.
I didn't say anything for you
to be worried about.
The last time you said
"Things always happen for the best"...
...you and Mom were getting a divorce.
So what's the terrific news this time?
Well, the truth of it is that...
What's this? PBS?
PBS, I'm sure. No, it's a cassette.
When The West Was Wet.
Who gave you this?
I went by the video arcade,
over by the laundromat...
...and they were playing these...
This guy was playing Cosmic Attack
while waiting for his shirts.
We talked and stuff...
And stuff?
Dad, cut me some slack.
He's a nice guy.
Nice guy?
Nice guys don't give
16-year-old girls stag films.
It was a tape, if you don't know.
Don't go near arcades,
don't even go near laundromats.
You're 16 years old.
You don't know the first thing
about life, about...
- I mean the near robbery
of the Pitstop Diner...
...about a week ago,
give or take a day.
- Oh, my God.
- What? What?
He said, "Hotshots with dumb luck
have no business handling crime. "
Who is that guy?
We're not hotshots,
we're non-victims.
I know it's the police's job
to stop crime...
...but it's everyone's right to
protect himself, be he male or female.
Be he male or... Redundancy
is odd, but we have that right.
He's a brain.
Why is there crime?
I think the root cause is criminals.
In crime, there must be
Criminals and B: Victims.
Or B: Victims, A: Criminals.
Without victims,
there's no criminals.
Unless criminals preyed
on other criminals, ad infinitum.
But I digress.
I'm speaking for myself,
not for Sonny Paluso, my compatriot.
- When I say I disagree...
- My God. He mentioned my name.
How would Mr. Van Dussen feel
if he had to undress at gunpoint...
...and wore no underwear,
like my poor friend, Sonny.
It's my opinion,
not Mr. Paluso's...
Directory Assistance.
A listing for Sonny Paluso
in either Brooklyn or Queens.
- How are you spelling that?
- P-A-L-U-S-O, Paluso.
- U-S-O?
- I guess. I'm not sure.
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