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GREEN ELEPHANT
Please get old folks, children and pregnant women away from the screen
Come in!
You called for me, comrade captain?
I did.
Two have been brought.
Do i register them?
Register, as it is required.
I understand.
Then you're free.
Listen...what time is it? do you know?
Just approximately...can you sense it?
I ask what time is it...
Just a moment, wait.
Anyway, it's all the same what time it is.
I don't care what's going on there.
Then don't fucking talk. Sit down.
Sit down, sit down...one can't do much sitting here.
Here you can only stand and rest.
Some bullshit...Stepan Razin...i don't give a fuck. Those drops don't do a fucking thing.
Drops, drops...
Sit down and give it a try.
Sit the fuck down...
I'll give it a try now.
Earlier, when i was still in normal service, i did twenty push-ups
every day...
before dinner, i did twenty push-ups...
Fuck, that's like some bird shitting, you know.
I'll show you how i did push-ups. Look.
At first i did like this...one time, softly, and after that...
Do you get it?
And about twenty times like that before dinner.
Then spirits appeared in our garrison,
and i took about 200 grams before dinner...
and then i stopped doing push-ups.
How you fucking get on my nerves!
Oh, well, why are you becoming angry?
Being angry will dearly cost you, here are just we two, understand?
It fucking keeps dripping. We'll get watered down and that's all.
We'll just get watered down, and that's all. you undertand?
Do you do push-ups yourself?
I fucking do it!
I see: a buffalo.
It would be good for you in the army.
Such boar as you are!
And you? Aren't you a boar?
Right. That's because i don't do push-ups for half a year already.
And i've become fucking fat as a meatball.
Earlier i was...i get on the bar...
hang there a little, stretch myself...
and then i do full circle with the first try and so twenty times like that.
I jump down, stretch my arms calmly...
Alright, i didn't want to...i can keep silent.
If you don't want to listen to me...
You're a tough guy, that's right. You have tough arms, legs.
...this problem worries me very much. I read a poem once...
i don't fucking remember poet's name
he wrote, shit, that Ivan the Terrible went crazy, oh, fuck, Stepan Razin
what's the fucking difference? Stepan the Terrible?
well, they kept dripping water on his head and he fucking lost it.
And what's with him?
Went crazy.
That's chinese torture.
Chinese, what's the difference?
Chinese, by the way, you know, i read, too...
I don't feel a fucking thing.
...they have these old people, seventy years
and they do special exercises every morning.
They go out of their homes...they all live in villages...
Well, i was born in a village, too...and they...they have this capital, i don't know,
Shanghai or what...
then all old people go outside, old hags...and they're poor, too...
they have poverty just like us...
and they do these special...
[Kazi-czuan]...anyway, some kind of their shit.
Do you know about it?
Respect, bro!
It all depends on your breathing.
You won't do a damn thing.
You have to do it for twenty years...
You're doing fucking great.
Perhaps, you have no problems with getting chick, too.
Stop talking fucking nonsense.
How the saying goes: as long as you have a hard-on...
I have a hard-on, i have!
Better sit down.
Alright, why are you so...
My character is...i have a calm character.
I have a calm character. If i use this as a bar in the mornings
i can break it and drown everything here.
If we unscrew this shit...
You're a tough guy and you'll get away, understand?
But i will be sitting there on the fence.
What fence? There's no fence.
But what is there? - Cock knows what.
Some kind of grid.  You can't get out through there.
There are wires and three phase current. Touch it and you're fucked.
Mother said i would be ok, but father told i would get fucked.
Who would fuck?
My father said to me. But mother, bitch,

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