writing something again.
But why? Eh.
What is he writing?
- Something about the hunting, probably.
- Yes, yes. It's such an interesting story.
Yes, you know, your highness,
he once went to the wood unarmed...
- How do you mean unarmed?
- I mean to hunt a bear.
It was not a bear but a mammoth.
But he did use a gun.
- A gun?
- Yes, loaded with a cherry stone.
It was sweet cherry.
First of all, it was not sweet cherry,
but current
And he fired when they
flew over his house.
- The bears.
- Do you think it was mammoths?
Then why did all that grow
on the deer's head?
You highness, let me start
from the very beginning.
On no account!
Stop it this minute!
In 20 minutes a war
with England will begin.
What about England? It is just
a habit. Always England.
Stop chattering! ln 20 minutes...
...in 20 minutes...
- Now what is that?
- The man under arrest.
Why is the orchestra playing?
Your highness, at first we were
getting ready for holidays
then for arrests,
then we decided to combine the two.
Where is our guard?
Where is the guard?
Evidently it is flanking the place.
Flanking whom?
Everyone.
- Baron.
- Your highness.
- How are things at home? ls everyone
all right? - Yes, thank you.
- Is it true?
- What?
Well, I don't know how to put it.
Well, in general...
Well, they say, that you...
that you declared war on England.
- I did not.
- You didn't?
Not yet. War shall begin
at 4 o'clock.
Unless England accepts the terms
of the ultimatum.
- The ultimatum?
- I sent them the ultimatum.
- To whom? - To the King of England
and members of the British Parliament.
I suggested that England
should stop the senseless war
with North American colonies
and acknowledge their independence.
The ultimatum gives them
the time till 16:00.
If my conditions are not accepted
I personally shall unleash the war.
- You will start the war?
- I will.
Where is the commander in chief?.. Ah?
So, in sending the ultimatum
to the King, the baron,
overstepped the mark.
A war is... Well, you know.
- I remember, your highness, when this...
- That will do.
Hand in you spear.
Your highness, don't go
against your conscience.
I know you are a noble man and in your
heart are opposed to England too.
- Yes, in my heart I am opposed.
Yes, I don't like it... - Yes.
- But I keep silent.
- A war is...
Wait! To cut a long story short
you are under arrest, baron.
Hand in your spear. I am waiting!
Hand it in, quick.
No discipline at all!
Whoever wants to, declares a war. Whoever
doesn't want to, doesn't declare war.
Baron, Baron, you wanted to see
the evening paper! Here it is!
- Please.
- Yes.
- "Typhoo in Sicily"
- Above.
"Where to take your family"
- Above.
- Here.
Ah, yes. "News from abroad:
...England acknowledged
American independence".
So!
10 to 4. Just in time. They are lucky.
Farewell.
- Incredible! He let him go!
- What could he do?
But that is a monstrous coincidence!
Can't you see?
He is not a duke. He is a softy!
Madam, what do you expect of him?
England capitulated.
Why does the war continue?
You mean they don't read newspapers?
Now I remember! He did shoot a deer.
But through the chimney.
Bravo! You look great
in this wedding dress.
- Every woman does.
- You look particularly good!
- It's a pity we wear it once a year.
- You will wear it every day.
We shall get married every day.
Do you like the idea?
Very much! But first you must
get the divorce.
Do you remember that the divorce
proceedings start in half an hour?
They started long ago.
The moment I saw you.
If you only knew what present
I have prepared for you!
- How many day are there in a year?
- 365...
Take your time.
It's difficult to speak when so many
sympathetic eyes are watching you.
Divorce is disgusting not only
because it parts the spouses
but also because afterwards they call
the man free and the woman dumped.
No! No need to pity me, gentlemen.
Don't humiliate me