This is Chris in the Morning.
The weather's typical
for this time of year.
Some of you may have heard
that nice little cypress tree
out at Kipnuk Lake...
fell over last Friday night
and flattened my trailer
like the proverbial pancake,
causing me to join the growing ranks
of the nation's homeless.
That's the bad news.
The good news is I no longer
have to carpool to work.
Courtesy of Maurice Minnifield,
I'm- Well, for only a small deduction
from my salary-
I'm living here at the station
until spring thaw when I can repair
my beautiful home.
Thank you, Maurice.
In other important social notes,
Cicely's own Dr. Fleischman
plans a two-week vacation...
to see his fiancйe Elaine
in the Big Apple.
Hello to Elaine from all of us, Doc.
Alaska paid for Joel's education,
now he pays us back...
with the finest in the cutting-edge
of medical care.
A little traveling music then
for the doc.
It's hard to believe he's been with us
only a scant eight months.
Tempus fugit, eh, Joel?
Doesn't fugit nearly fast enough.
You think banging on a pipe with
a wrench is going to make it go faster?
It's just what I dreamed of
when I was at Columbia,
that I'd be practicing medicine
in a room where I can't feel my fingers.
- It's not that cold.
- It's 40 degrees inside,
if you don't count the windchill factor
blowing through these cracks.
If you'd take off your snowsuit,
you'd get acclimated.
My blood would thicken?
That's very scientific.
Like with a car?
Colder climate, more viscous motor oil?
Well, I have nice, thin New York blood.
You probably don't have blood at all.
Get off my case, Fleischman.
just give me my pills.
No problem. So I guess
Rick got back okay through the ice fog.
There are other ways besides sex
to get a bladder infection, Fleischman.
- Yeah, but that's the funnest.
- What? This is your hobby?
Thinking about my sex life?
Hey, you brought it up, O'Connell.
I was only referring to the fact that
I ran into your boyfriend at the barbershop.
You know what your problem is?
That my bladder couldn't make the trip
to see a doctor in Anchorage.
You are defensive.
You are so heavily defended,
you create a hostile reality.
Two every four hours.
Go pee in this cup.
I guess Rick made it back okay.
You got your Publisher's Clearinghouse.
Okay, but if you win, I get half.
Okay?
I'm preapproved for a gold card.
I'll run right over to Saks.
Alumni fund. Toss.
Spy magazine, all right.
It's three months old.
Delivery by dogsled.
Elaine. Hello.
There's no heat in here.
This could take a while.
- Well, just get acclimated.
- Acclimated?
This seat's like an ice cube.
Dear Joey, hi.
Listen, I'm really sorry,
and in a perfect worid,
I could tell you this in person.
And I know the timing
is especially terrible
with your plans and all.
No. Not the trip to New York.
Anything but the trip to New York.
But I did all this stuff.
I got you some great seats at Les Miz,
sixth row, center.
Yes!
And Dr. Bloom can fix your crown
on the 18th, 2:00.
I'm sure by now your mother has cornered
the market on pot roast in Queens.
Do you think she actually tries to cook it
to the consistency of shoelaces or what?
I mean, I guess it's good, in a way,
to have food that you can floss with.
Ah, this is so hard. I hate this.
Anyway, Joey, I don't know
any other way to say what I have to say,
so I guess I'll just say it.
I met somebody else.
Danny Goldman.
No, it isn't Danny Goldman.
I know you think I've had
a crush on him since the ninth grade,
although I don't know why
you think I could stand somebody
who calls me "Lainester. '"
He's a little older than I am.
Actually, he's quite a bit older than I am.
I don't know.
Maybe it's a father thing.
You'd like him, Joey. He's very nice.
Very gentle. Very gentile.
His name's Dwight.
He's a federal judge in Louisville.
Well, he was. He's retired now
and he's devoting himself full-time
to his watercolors.
I've