AND BARRIS LAUGHING] Well, there are female narcs. LUCKMAN: Oh, hey, I'd like to meet one of those. No, I don 't mean a female. I mean just the narc, knowingly, like, positive. BARRIS: Sure. So you could positively know. And you will. When he slaps the cuffs on, you'll know for sure, when that day comes. How could a guy do that? Pose as a narc? LUCKMAN: What? BARRIS: Huh? What? Pose as a narc? BARRIS: No, you said it. So yeah. - Pose as a narc. Oh, sh... Shit, I'm spaced. Pose as a narc, wow. Pose as a narc. [CHUCKLING] My brains are scrambled today. FRED: Hm. [PUNCHES TABLE] [IN NORMAL VOICE] Christ, Barris, what the fuck? [BARRIS CLEARS THROAT] Yes, hi. How are you? I have something somewhat emergent to report. I don 't know if I should be summoning the inhalator squad... ... or the resuscitation squad. Yes, ma 'am? I don 't know. I don 't want to say it's not cardiac arrest... ... but it's either that or an involuntary asphyxiation of a bolus within the... The address, yes. The address is simple... ... although I've never sent myself a piece of mail here. Seven... Seven... Seven-zero-niner. Street? Is the street relevant? FRED: Come on. - Tell you this much, it is a cul-de-sac. [VOMITS] BARRIS: Does that technically qualify as a street? I'm pleased to report we won 't be needing your assistance after all. Thank you. Have a nice day. There you go. Took care of itself. [LUCKMAN GAGS AND GRUNTS] BARRIS: Okay. LUCKMAN: Oh, Jesus. BARRIS: You all right? There you go. LUCKMAN: I must've passed out. BARRIS: Yeah. LUCKMAN: Well, you... I was dreaming. - Must have almost died. - Yeah. Shit. And what were you doing while I was being escorted by dead relatives... ... to the bright light? Jacking off? No, no, no. You saw me. I was on the phone. I summoned the paramedics. - I sprung into action without delay. - Bullshit. You were cleaning your pipe. I was wrapping my pipe. You were unconscious. You the only person in the universe who never heard of the Heimlich maneuver? All right, I'm gonna give you a little feedback... ... since you seem to be proceeding through life like a cat without whiskers... ... perpetually caught behind the refrigerator. Your life and watching you live it... ... is like a gag reel of ineffective bodily functions. I swear to God that a toddler has a better understanding... ... of the intricacies of chew, swallow, digest... ... don 't kill yourself on your TV dinner. And yet, you've managed to turn this near-death fuck-up of yours... ... into a moral referendum on me. LUCKMAN: You are a monster! - Oh, fuck. BARRIS: You are a billy goat. LUCKMAN: A sick, depraved un... [THOMAS YORKE'S "BLACK SWAN" PLAYING OVER RADIO] [STATIC CRACKLES] NARRATOR: Charles Freck, becoming progressively more and more depressed... ... by what was happening around him, decided finally to off himself. There was no problem in the circles where he hung out... ... in putting an end to yourself. You just bought a large quantity of downers... ... and took them with cheap wine. The planning part had to do with the artifacts... ... he wanted found on him by later archeologists. He had spent several days deciding... ... much longer than he had ------------------------------ Читайте также: - текст А вдруг получится! на английском - текст Покровские ворота на английском - текст Окраина на английском - текст Пропавший без вести 2: Начало на английском - текст Светлячок на английском |