Christmas!
Enough gooey sh...
Show of emotion.
Everyone, let's dig in!
LESLIE: Everybody, save the paper.
We can use it next year. And the bows.
Merry Christmas.
Kevin!
Merry Christmas!
I got something for you.
What's this?
It's a turtledove. I have one.
You have one.
As long as we each have a turtledove,
we'll be friends forever.
Oh, Kevin.
Thank you.
I won't forget you. Trust me.
The room service bill, sir.
Merry Christmas.
Uh, oh.
Nice family.
Really.
Merry Christmas indeed.
PETER:
Kevin!
You spent $967 on room service?!
English SDH Subtitles by
Gelula/SDIHey, Rod, do they have
nude beaches in Florida?
Where are my magazines?
I'm sure I left them here somewhere.
Leslie!
Leslie, what'd you do
with my gol-darn golf balls?
Fifteen and a half sun block.
Father, could I get
a string bikini in Florida?
Make sure you pack your beach towel.
- Nobody can order pizza in this house.
- Where are my golf balls?
- You know why? 'Cause I'm the only guy...
- Check in your pockets.
All right, has anybody seen my sun block?
What's the point of going to Florida
if you're gonna put on sun block?
I don't care if I age like an old suitcase.
I'm getting toasted.
Great. Now you can be a skag
with a slightly darker shade of skin.
He's just jealous 'cause he can't tan.
His freckles just connect.
Hey, hey, easy on the fluids, pal.
The rubber sheets are packed.
Vicky says she wants to go with "Ding."
Behind "Ding" is 200 points.
All right. Good for you.
Two hundred points. All right.
- Honey, are you packed yet?
- Yes.
Yes.
- Everything I put out for you?
- Yes.
Yes.
Did you see what Grandma Penelope
sent you for the trip?
Let me guess. Donald Duck slippers?
Close. An inflatable clown
to play with in the pool.
How exciting.
Why do we have to go to Florida?
There's no Christmas trees in Florida.
Kevin, what is it with you
and Christmas trees?
How could you have Christmas
without a Christmas tree, Mom?
We'll find a nice, fake silver one
or decorate a palm tree.
Goodbye, everybody.
Guests of the new
Celebrity Ding Dang Dong
stay at the world-renowned Plaza Hotel,
New York's most exciting
hotel experience.
For reservations, call toll-free 1-800-759...
Honey, do you know where the batteries
for this camcorder are?
Yeah, I put it in the charger.
- How's this?
- Much better.
Hey, Kevin, you better go put your tie on.
We don't want to be late
for the Christmas pageant.
My tie's in the bathroom.
I can't go in there,
'cause Uncle Frank's taking a shower.
He says if I walked in there
and saw him naked,
I'd grow up never feeling like a real man.
Whatever that means.
I'm sure he was kidding.
Just run in there and get your tie,
get out, and don't look at anything.
Well, this cat they're talking about
I wonder who could it be
'Cause they know I'm the heaviest cat
The heaviest cat you ever did see
When they see me
walking down the street
When the fellas want to speak
Hey, hey
On their faces they wear a silly smirk
'Cause they know I'm the king
of the cool jerk
Get out of here, you nosy little pervert,
or I'm gonna slap you silly!
You're cooking, Frankie!
Christmas tree, my Christmas tree
Lit up like a star
When I see my Christmas tree
Can loved ones be far?
Christmas tree, I'm certain
Wherever I roam...
Kevin's solo's coming up. Tell Leslie.
Kevin's solo's coming up. Tell Frank.
Okay. Frank... Frank!
Christmastime means laughter
Toboggans in the snow
Caroling to children
With faces aglow
Stockings on the mantel
A wreath on the door
And my merriest Christmas
Stop it!
Needs just one thing more
Christmas tree, my Christmas tree
Lit up like...
Kevin!
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,
I'd like to apologize to my family
for whatever displeasure
I might have caused you.
What?
My prank was immature and ill-timed.
Immature or not,
it was pretty gol-darn hilarious.
I'd also like to apologize to my brother.
Kevin, I'm sorry.
Buzz,