gonna have to resolve it
one way or another...
or you're just gonna
destroy the relationship.
See, the...
I forgot what I was talking about.
- My life.
- I'm sorry.
It sounds to me
like Richard wants marriage...
more than you don't want marriage.
Now, he is willing to try more...
Yeah, he wants it more strongly...
than you don't want it.
What?
What what? What did I say?
You said that I want... No.
Wait, you said Richard doesn't want...
No, you said Richard wants...
- Does Richard want something?
- What?
You said that Richard wants something.
That he wants something.
What does he want?
- Who?
- Richard!
Was it possible? Could it be?
Then a lizard ran across all their paws...
but they all held their ground.
Honey, remind me
to call home later tonight.
All was silent,
except for a dachshund that sneezed.
And then there was a puff of smoke,
and a magician appeared.
I feel like something is wrong.
"Aha!" he chortled and exhorted.
And then, with a wave
of his magic chew-stick...
their flea collars started spinning around
on their necks.
The collie got so frightened,
he peed on the spaniel's leg.
Hello?
What?
I feel like something's wrong.
I'm worried about my folks.
They're just getting old, honey, that's all.
I know. I think they're gonna die soon.
- Paula.
- It's possible.
So I just practice.
- Practice?
- I pretend they're dead...
and then I really get myself
very unhappy...
you know, and then I feel the grief.
And then I guess, it's just,
I'm preparing for when it actually happens.
Let me get this straight.
You kill your parents off in your mind
so you won't feel bad when they die?
That's how much I love them.
You're very sick, Paula.
You're beyond Black Irish.
Honey, let's go back East.
My parents are celebrating
their 40th wedding anniversary.
I'd like you to meet them.
Before they die?
Yeah.
I don't know.
I don't think I'd do too well
with your parents.
Why not?
Your preoccupation with death.
I just have to assume
you're the tip of the iceberg.
I'm gonna take a shower.
You didn't stay to hear my whole idea.
I've been thinking about what you said.
And...
You know how I feel about change.
I'm not very good at change,
you know that.
And I'm not impulsive, you know.
Who is this?
Richard, it's very hard to be serious
in a shower.
Please help me.
What do you want?
I've had a lot of time to think it over...
and I think we should...
- What?
- Go ahead and do it.
Do what?
- You know.
- You know what?
Get...
Get...
married.
Are you sure?
- I didn't push you into this?
- No.
I love you, Paula.
Honey.
If we get married,
would you promise me one thing?
Anything, darling.
We won't tell anyone.
The limousine what?
The limousine pulls up
in front of a three-story building.
A nondescript building...
sitting in the middle of...
No. Sitting...
Among the buildings, among...
- Up against...
...steel structures of...
No, in the countryside.
Isolated countryside.
- Yeah. Isolated...
- That's good.
Better.
"Waterproofing, weather-stripping,
weaving, webbing...
"weddings."
Webbing, weddings.
What comes after wedding?
Welding.
That's appropriate. It's right in there
with "webbing" and "welding."
"Now and Forever Wedding Chapel."
Too cute.
"Chapel of the Two Bells.
We rent kneeling benches, candelabras...
"and caged, live, white whispering doves."
No, I want a wedding chapel that says,
"We give sodium pentathol."
Here's a good one.
"Los Hermanos Wedding Chapel."
It says...
What?
It means if you're Spanish and mad,
you can marry in 10 minutes.
That's it. Where is it?
"12722, Alvarado Street.
"Half a block south of the Burrito King."
That's perfect. It's on the way
to the train station. Nobody will see us.
Help me.
You know, maybe we should fly.
I've been thinking about this.
Three days on a train. Three days
to think about meeting your parents.
Trains are so romantic.
Remember Giant?
Remember