-Hit it good.
Do my best.
Good shot.
I know.
I must ask you something.
The NBA must face reality.
What's happening is serious.
They're going to need
new players with talent.
Skilled guys who never really
thought about a professional career.
Think I got a shot?
Come on, really?
Don't kid.
It's a man's game.
-You can't play.
-What if I tried hard?
Keep it down.
It's because I'm white.
No. Larry's white. So what?
Larry's not white. Larry's clear.
Get inside his ball!
You clowns can't beat that.
-My best shot ever.
-You haven't played long.
A Hall-of-Fame shot.
-Nice shot, Mr. Bird.
-Larry, please.
Nice shot, Mr. Larry.
Nice shot.
You can do this.
Don't be nervous, you can do this.
You feel the NBA has to face reality,
don't you?
Look for some players where
they never looked before.
Just look at the ball.
Visualize where you want it to go.
Be the ball.
Get off the tee.
Can't jump.
Go on.
Close to the pin?
For dinner?
-Sounds good.
-I'll go close to the pin.
I'll have some.
Not bad.
Good shot.
Get down.
Look at that spin.
Come on!
It is alive!
My first hole in one.
Never seen one of these.
Nothing but the bottom of the cup.
-That's his ball too.
-Yeah, it's my ball.
Wait, let me get a picture!
You must smile.
Reach in for the ball and then smile, okay?
Is this good?
Just take the picture!
What kind of camera is that?
Don't point it at me.
-I didn't do anything!
-Where'd he go?
Look out for that first step,
doc, it's a real lulu.
Bugs Bunny?
You expected the Easter Bunny?
You're not real.
Not real? If I weren't real, could I do this?
Is that Michael?
It's Michael!
It's Air Jordan.
Basketball!
I thought I saw....
I did. I did see Michael Jordan.
Pardon me, Mr. Jordan.
Can I have your auto...
Your John Hancock, please?
Let the doctor take a look.
A little high.
Going down!
So, what do you say we go for a little spin?
Let's see what we got inside here.
Say, "Ahh. "
All right. He's okay!
What's going on here?
I thought you'd never ask.
These aliens from outer space want to
make us slaves in their theme park.
They're little. So we challenged
them to a basketball game.
Then, they ain't so little!
They're huge! We need to beat these guys.
They're talking about slavery!
They'll make us do stand-up,
the same jokes every night!
We'll be locked up like wild animals,
trotted out to perform...
...for a bunch of bug-eyed, fat-headed,
humor-challenged aliens!
What I'm trying to say is...
...we need your help!
I'm a baseball player now.
Right. And I'm a Shakespearean actor.
Mike?
Michael? It's Stan.
Stan Podolak.
I need you to come out now, okay?
You got a baseball game tomorrow.
And I'd look pretty stupid
ifyou don't show up.
Think he's all right? I hate to leave him.
He's fine. I think he just had to
get away from that Stan character.
He's pathetic, isn't he?
I'll give us both twos. We weren't in
any kind of emotional state to putt.
I think that's fair.
If Mike is gone, the NBA is
going to need some new people.
There's room at the top.
An exciting guy
who could even perform at half-time.
You know David Stern?
A phone call from you....
I want to help...
...but I haven't played in a long time.
My timing's off.
We'll fix it.
Look at our facility.
We got hoops.
We got weights.
We've got balls.
You sure do. This place is a mess.
You're worried about a mess?
There's nothing here a little
spit shine wouldn't fix.
Spit shine!
Lemony-fresh.
You guys are nuts.
Correction: We're Looney Tunes.
And as such are the exclusive property
and trademark of Warner Bros. Inc.
I'm here!
Me too!
That hurt.
Who are they?
Remember the tiny aliens I told you about?
You've heard of the Dream Team?
We're the Mean Team, wussieman!
Wussieman.
We're the Monstars.
M-o-n-....
Let's see what you got...
...chump!
I don't play basketball anymore.
"I don't play basketball anymore. "
Maybe you're chicken.
I say, I resemble