center. Let's go.
How come Andrew gets to get up?
If he gets up, we all will.
It'll be anarchy.
- Watch the magazines.
- (Bender) It's out of my hands.
That's very clever, sir.
But what if there's a fire?
Violating fire codes
and endangering children's lives
would be unwise
at this juncture in your career.
What are you doing with this?
Get this out of here. Come on!
- The school has fire exits.
- Show Dick some respect.
Let's go.
Go! Get back in your seat.
I expected a little more
from a varsity letterman.
You're not fooling anybody, Bender.
The next screw that falls out
is going to be you.
- (Mutters) Eat my shorts.
- What was that?
Eat... my...shorts!
You've bought yourself
another Saturday.
- I'm crushed!
- You've just bought one more.
I'll have to check my calendar.
Good. It's going to be filled.
We'll keep going.
Want another one?
Just say the word!
Instead of going to prison,
you'll come here. Are you through?
- No.
- (Vernon) I'm doing society a favour.
- So?
- (Vernon) That's another one.
I've got you
for the rest of your life.
- Want another?
- Yes.
(Vernon) You got it.
That's another one, pal.
Cut it out!
(lndistinct)
- (Vernon) You through?
- Not even close, bud.
- Good. One more.
- Do you think I give a shit?
Another.
- You through?
- How many is that?
Seven, including the one when you
asked about Barry Manilow's closet.
- Now it's eight.
- Seven, sir.
Shut up, Peewee.
You're mine, Bender.
For two months, I've got you.
I've got you.
What can I say? I'm thrilled.
I'm sure that's what you want
these people to believe.
You ought to spend a little less time
trying to impress people.
You might be better off.
All right, that's it.
I'm going to be right outside
those doors.
The next time I have to come in,
I'm cracking skulls.
(Screams) Fuck you!
Fuck.
(# Rock guitar music plays)
Wake up!
Who has to go to the lavatory?
- That's real intelligent.
- You're right.
It's wrong to destroy literature.
It's such fun to read.
And...
... Molay really pumps my nads.
Moliere.
(# Violin music plays)
I love his work.
Big deal. Nothing to do
when you're locked in a vacancy.
- Speak for yourself.
- Do you think I'd speak for you?
I don't even know your language.
- Hey, are you grounded tonight?
- I don't know.
My mum said I was
but my dad told me to blow her off.
There's a big party at Stubby's.
Should be pretty wild.
(Girl) Yeah?
(Andrew) Yeah. Are you going to go?
- I doubt it.
- How come?
If I do what my mother tells me not to,
it's because my father says it's OK.
There's a monster deal.
It's endless. Any minute, divorce.
- Who do you like better?
- What?
- Who do you like better?
- They're both screwed.
No, I mean,
if you had to choose between them.
I don't know.
I'd probably go live with my brother.
Neither gives a shit. They use me
to get back at each other.
Ha!
- Shut up!
- You're just feeling sorry for yourself.
- Nobody else would.
- You're breaking my heart.
- (Bender) Sporto?
- What?
- Do you get along with your parents?
- If I say yes, I'm an idiot. Right?
You're an idiot anyway.
But if you say you get along
with your parents, you're a liar, too.
You know something? If we weren't
in school, I'd waste you.
Can you hear this?
You want me to turn it up?
Hey, fellas, I mean...
I don't like my parents, either.
I don't get along with them.
Their idea of parental compassion
is just wacko, you know.
- Dork.
- Yeah?
You are a parent's wet dream, OK?
That's the problem.
I can see you getting bunged up that
they make you wear these clothes.
But face it,
you're a neo-maxi-zoom dweebie,
out to make yourself a better citizen.
Why do you have to insult everybody?
I'm being honest, asshole.
I would expect you
to know the difference.
- Well, he's got a name.
- Yeah?
- What's your name?
- Brian.
- See?
- My condolences.
What's your name?
What's yours?
- Claire.
- Claire?
- It's a family