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Stop blowing at me!
- Sorry.
- I'm about a half hour away.
- Larry.
What is goin' on?
Somebody from the university has got
a whole bunch of media out front.
Banes. Damn it!
Can you get rid of 'em?
I don't think so.
Larry, what is this?
I don't wanna talk on the cellular.
Just meet us outside!
- What's goin' on?
- Somebody tipped the press.
- Oh, what are we gonna do?
- I don't know. I'm thinkin'.
Better be big.
You pulled me away from dinner with
the university's largest benefactor.
This is big, Edward,
literally and figuratively.
Ladies and gentlemen,
may I have your attention, please?
Thank you for waiting.
I'm Noah Banes...
director of Lufkin's
Biotechnology Research Center.
This is Edward Sawyer,
president of Leland University.
We are here to announce a momentous
breakthrough in medical science.
Under my personal guidance
and supervision...
and with the aid
of a new wonder drug, Expectane...
Dr. Alexander Hesse of my staff
will be arriving shortly...
to give birth to a child
he has himself carried to term.
- Are you saying he's pregnant?
- Yes.
I am saying he's pregnant.
I see him!
And what perfect timing.
Here he is now, ladies and gentlemen.
I give you the world's
first pregnant man.
What is it?
What are you doin' here?
This is my building.
Get outta here.
I got a medical emergency.
Go on. Back off.
Hi, Mom.
What is this?
- It's just a woman.
- That's my wife you're talkin' about.
Hey, Ned. Thank you.
All right, okay, baby.
Watch your step.
- Okay.
- Up here.
- Okay.
- Okay.
Up! Upsa-daisie.
Upsa-daisie.
I've got you. I've got you.
Come on, give me room.
Ned, let's get her in there.
- You told us there was a pregnant man.
- There is... a pregnant man.
He's having a baby, Edward.
I swear it.
You're fired.
- Why are we stopping on two?
- It's a surprise.
- I prepped the operating room upstairs.
- Good. You did good.
- Are they here yet?
- Oh, thank God. Not yet.
Who's here?
Angela, enough with the huffin'.
We're all alone.
Imagine a tranquil...
Little birdies.
- In here! In here!
- Cheep, cheep.
- Forget the birdies.
- Thank God! Are you okay?
- Up, Angela, out of there.
- Larry, what is this?
- It's our patient.
- What's the matter with him?
My best guess, his baby's
tangled in the large intestine.
- His baby? His ba...
- Hurry!
- His baby? Oh, God!
- Yes.
- Is the room prepped?
- Yeah, it's prepped.
Go on, Louise,
open the door!
Relax. Just relax.
Get him undressed!
Look at the belly on that guy!
- Please, let me do something!
- Look, look.
This is dangerous,
both for Alex and the baby.
I don't know what's gonna happen.
There's nothin' you can do.
Just go outside with Angela, okay?
Keep her company.
All right.
All right?
What?
- Not you? Not now? No.
- Yes, yes.
- I'll get someone.
- I want Larry! I want Larry!
Be...
Easy, easy.
Okay, look, um...
Let's imagine a garden with trees and
birds cheeping. Cheep, cheep, cheep...
Let's imagine drugs.
- What can I do?
- Have the baby for me.
- Feel that?
- What?
- Feel that? No?
- No.
Well, the drugs are working.
We gave you an epidural.
You're gonna be awake through this,
Alex. It's safer that way.
Just try and stay calm.
Okay.
Here we go.
Just relax.
Think about the baby. Okay?
- Blot, blot.
- Blot.
- I'm gonna cut right here.
- That's good. Very good.
That's good. I'm not leaving you.
- I'm not leaving. Hold on. I'm gonna...
- Oh, God!
- check.
- Oh, this is hard. Oh, this is hard.
- Where are you?
- I'm here. I'm here.
Do you think he's all right?
Okay.
That's good.
It's all tangled up
in the intestines.
Transverse colon's got it.
There's a lot of fluid.
It's clear.
Suck it down there.
- Okay, here.
- All right.
All right. Now push here.
Ready? Push.
Push it. Push it.
That's your baby, Alex.
It's a girl! Seven pounds, six ounces.
She's got her mother's looks.
- Father and daughter are doing fine...
- I have a

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