only person who's
going to enjoy these bad boys is me.
We thought Phoebe would leave
But she just stayed and stayed
That's right, I'm here all night
And Chandler will never get... 
Hey, here's a dollar.
Consider it a deposit.
Please sing at our wedding.
Thank you.
Now who will perform the ceremony
Who will perform the cer... 
I'll pound on him in the morning.- Hey. Who wants French toast?
- I'll have some.
Me too. Eggs and milk in the fridge.
Thanks.
- What's the matter?
- My hand feels weird.
I guess it's because I'm engaged!
- When will that start getting annoying?
- Start?
Let's start the wedding plans.
- Okay.
- Already?
We got a lot to do. We gotta think
about the flowers, the music...
- I have thoughts on the music.
- Too many cooks... .
Take it from me. All you have to do
is show up and say the right name.
- What in God's name is that?
- Oh, my God, the wedding book?
I haven't seen that
since 4th grade.
This baby has everything. Take,
you know, locations for instance:
First organized alphabetically,
then geographically...
...then by square footage.
That is so smart.
Break it off. Break it off, now.
The One With Rachel's Book
English Subtitles by
Gelula/SDI
That conclusively proves...
...that I had the idea
for Jurassic Park first.
Let's take a look...
Phoebe, what are you doing here?
I need to talk to you. It's urgent.
It's about Monica and Chandler.
Oh, my God. Of course.
Would you please excuse me
for a moment?
Do you know each other's hometowns?
Why don't you...?
What's going on?
Well, not much. I was just thinking
that since they just got engaged...
...it would be nice
if they have privacy.
So could I just move in with you
for a couple days?
Okay, sure. But what's wrong
with Monica and Chandler?
Nothing. Why?
Phoebe, you said it was urgent.
Yeah, it is. My movie starts
in five minutes.
Do you realize I have a classroom
full of students?
Oh, I'm sorry. I'm so rude.
Does anyone want to come to the movie?
I haven't cleared the
budget with my parents...
...but tell me how this is for music.
A string quartet for the processional,
a jazz trio for cocktails...
...the Bay City Rollers
for dancing... .
Wait, that was
for my 6th grade wedding.
You couldn't get them anyway.
Ian doesn't play anymore, and Derek... .
Derek is a name I shouldn't know.
Mon, do you have another pillow,
something a little snugglier?
Why are you napping here
instead of at your place?
- The duck.
- What, the duck?
What the hell
did the damn duck do now?
Well, he did not get sick
somewhere in there...
...and it was immediately found
and properly cleaned up.
Do I get to look at this book...
...or is it just for people
involved in the wedding?
Of course you can look at it.
I want your opinion.
Here you go.
- What about centerpieces?
- Centerpieces!
- Roses or lilies?
- Definitely roses.
I think they're more "wedding-y. "
- But lilies are the clear choice.
- Oh, my God, it's like one mind.
Guys, guys, you gotta let me nap.
I'm gonna get cranky.
Joey, there's a perfectly good couch
across the hall.
Yes, it is perfectly good...
...and it is not one of the places
the duck got sick.
What?
- All right, I'm gonna go.
- Joey, what did the duck do?
I don't know,
but he did not eat your face cream.
Hey, little buddy. How you feeling?
What the hell is in that face cream?
That's so soft.
Pillowcases!
"Zelda looked at the chimney sweep. 
Her father, the vicar..."
Vicar? 
"...wouldn't be home for hours. 
Her loins were burning. 
She threw caution to the wind
and reached out and grabbed his..."
This is a dirty book!
Phoebe?
Oh, Ross, hi.
- Phoebe, what are you doing?
- Sorry, I'm with a client right now.
- Phoebe!
- Okay, let's talk outside.
Phoebe, you can't massage people
in my apartment.
I did it at Monica and Chandler's.
And they