Christmas is a very busy time, sir.
Is this because of the burrito thing?
- You need to give him money.
- It was a joke!
To get a table. Places like this
are always shaking you down.
- Everybody wants a payoff.
- All right, calm down, O'Malley.
- I'll slip him some money.
- But you've got to be smooth.
Hey, I can be smooth.
We're in a hurry.
If you could get us a table...
...a bit quicker, I'd appreciate it.
- Of course, sir.
- Okay.
- How'd it go?
- Had the money in the wrong hand.
You don't feel...
...like you're gonna throw up?
- No.
Well, I do. So let's... .
So, Ben, you... .
You know what holiday is coming up?
Christmas.
Yeah, and you know what
other holiday is coming up?
Christmas Eve.
Yes, but also... .
Hanukkah!
See, you're part Jewish
and Hanukkah is a Jewish holiday.
Santa has reindeers that can fly.
Right, but on Hanukkah...
Hanukkah is a celebration
of a miracle.
Years and years ago there were
these people called the Maccabees.
Okay, that's right. Yes...
...but on Hanukkah, we sing:
Okay, it's not a contest.
When is Santa coming?
How about this year,
instead of Santa...
...we have fun celebrating Hanukkah?
No Santa?
Was I bad?
No, no, no, you weren't bad.
You've been very good, Ben.
- Santa's mad at me.
- No, hey, hey, come on.
Ben, Santa is not mad at you, okay?
You're his favorite little guy.
So Santa's coming?
Yes!
Santa's coming.
It's easy. Just keep it casual.
Shake his hand and give him the money.
- How do you know so much about this?
- I don't know.
Richard used to do it, didn't he?
We'd be eating our soup right now.
Mustached bastard.
Those people just left. Come on.
Quick, give him the money.
Excuse me.
So you like the drums.
That's great.
I was worried that
they would create maybe...
...an unbearable living situation.
But, okay, well, apparently not.
So, yay!
Hey, we already learned a song.
Ready? One, two, three, four.
Tequila!
That's fun.
Here you go.
Thank you, Gunther.
Put her there.
Definitely not easier with coins.
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
Hey, Pheebs.
Here. Now I only owe you $49.50.
Hey, Pheebs...
...if you want to get Joey a gift
that disrupts the entire building...
...why not something more subtle...
...like a wrecking ball...
...or a vial of small pox
to release in the hallway?
It's not just the drum noise.
Every five minutes...
...Joey throws his sticks
in the air...
...and I have to hear:
"Oh, my eye! Oh, God, my eye! "
- I mean, it's so annoying.
- Yes, thank you.
You see, this is how normal people
are supposed to react to drums.
You got Joey drums to annoy Rachel...
...so she wouldn't want
to live there anymore?
Maybe on some level.
You could just not throw the sticks
up in the air.
What is rock 'n' roll about that?
Hey, Joey, I got you another present.
Hold it!
Before you tell me what it is... .
Okay, what is it?
It's a...
...tarantula!
God, Rachel, I'm sorry.
What was I thinking...
...giving Joey this big, gross,
scary spider...
...in such a poorly constructed cage?
What are you talking about?
I love them.
I had a tarantula when I was a kid.
But it died because my cat ate it.
And then my cat died.
But, Joey, isn't this cool?
Is it on me?
I feel like it's on me. I got...
Oh, isn't that adorable?
Joey is afraid of the tarantula.
He's so adorable.
He's so much fun.
I'm glad you're having
so much fun here.
Wait a minute.
What's the matter?
Our apartment is ready.
And that makes you angry because...?
Because you'd rather
live here with Joey.
- Where did you get that?
- Monica and Chandler...
...said you were having
so much fun here...
...and apparently no amount of drums
or tarantula is gonna change that.
Did you get all this stuff for Joey...
...to try to drive me out
of the apartment?
You might as well
have gotten him a fish.
You know how fish freak me out.
Fish.
But it wouldn't have mattered.
We're gonna live together.
That's the deal.
Yes, but