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I was just
lighting the oven.
Just lighting... You could've
been killed! We could've all died!
Oh, well,
thank you very much.
I'm not completely helpless
in the kitchen.
I do know how
to light an oven.
Well, yeah, but...
-You mean this thing works?
-So far, so good.
Well, it's amazing.
What about the, uh...
-What do you call these?
-The burners.
-I haven't tried them yet.
-Maybe we shouldn't press our luck.
-Wanna see the refrigerator?
-[Grinding, Squeaking]
-No water.
We've got gas and electricity, though.
That's two out of three.
Art's calling his brother.
Oh, good news.
You're not gonna have
to sleep with him.
Just a little dinner,
some dancing.
-How long do you think all that'll take?
-Two weeks.
Really? That's all?
When do you think you could start?
Just as soon
as your cheque clears.
Couldn't you at least hang the door?
I've got enough cash for that.
Haven't got
the right materials.
Wood's rotten.
Won't hold a screw.
Which reminds me:
-I'm late for my next job.
-[Engine Starts]
-If you know what I mean.
-[Car Radio] # I gotta be me #
-# I gotta be me #
-Yeah, I know what you mean.
# What else can I be ##
[Door Opens, Closes]
[Coughing] In spite of
all the problems...
in spite of the prospect of indentured
servitude for the rest of my life...
in debt beyond
my wildest dreams...
I love the house.
So do I.
And I love you.
-Life is good.
-## [Violin]
[Door Closes]
## [Continues]
-[Insects Buzzing]
-[Birds Chirping]
[Zipper Zips Down]
[Water Pouring]
Prostate trouble?
-[Water Stops]
-[Zipper Zips Up]
[Birds Chirping Loudly]
[Door Opens]
-[Door Closes]
-[Footsteps Approaching]
Well, that was fast.
We have very weak trees.
"Weak trees"?
[Doorbell Chimes,
Winds Down]
I guess that's the door.
Hurry, don't let it ring again.
-You Fielding?
My brother Art
recommended you.
-I don't usually take jobs in this area.
-I'm glad you can make an exception.
-Let's not get ahead of ourselves, okay?
-I'm sorry.
-Where should we start?
-Well, you could offer me a drink.
I don't know
where my manners are.
Here it is, nearly 11:30.
You must be parched.
What? Wait a minute! We haven't even
talked about the plumbing yet!
And we're not going to,
not with your attitude.
Oh, saving the good scotch
for the company, are we?
No wonder you've been turned down
by every plumber in the valley.
-That's not true!
-Don't make it worse by lying.
I'm not lying!
I haven't tried everybody yet.
you gotta help me!
I don't know.
Write me a cheque quick,
before I come to my senses. Five grand.
-Five grand... Five thousand dollars?
-That's just a deposit.
You didn't even...
I'm not tryin' to tell you your business,
but you haven't even looked at my pipes.
I looked at them three years ago.
You figure they've improved with age?
-[Engine Starts]
-[Car Radio] # Me #
# I gotta be me #
# What else can I be
but what I am ##
Prep school.
[Clears Throat]
Phi Beta Kappa.
Four years of law school,
law review.
Are you all right?
Oh, yeah, I'm fine.
The secret is not to,
uh, look down.
Oh, why did you
say that?
Look down?
It's a secret.
I was fine
till you said that.
I'm sorry.
You're doin' great.
-Just great.
If you don't mind,
I'm gonna share this bath with you...
-because I can't do this a second time.
I think that's
a swell idea.
That way you can save your energy
for more worthwhile causes.
Would you get the rest
of the water, okay?
Hi, this is Julia Child with a tip
on making crepes Suzette...
that marvellous flaming dessert
that you do at the table.
You need a nice flaming set-up.
I've got a heat source there.
There's an


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