dinner?
As customary, we will be
at the Excelsior Hotel
in the Orchid Room.
Cliff will introduce
Harmon Rousehorn.
Cliff?
Cliff, may we have
your attention, please?
Oh, ahem...
I'm sorry, uh, go ahead, sir.
Uh, the president emeritus
will present
the honorary degree.
Uh, Mr. Rousehorn
will make a few brief remarks
and then present the college
with the endowment check
for the Harold Robbins Chair.
Are there any questions?
Will there be a fruit cup?
Yes.
Will there be
a choice of vegetables?
No.
Last year there
wasn't any fruit cup
And the shrimp were off.
This year there
will be a fruit cup.
Uh, this is
Chancellor Skridlow.
Hello? Criff? Criff?
Uh, Cliff,
I believe this is for you.
Would you please
make it snappy, son?
Uh, this is Criff,
uh, Cliff.
Cliff, good morning. 
I'm still tingling
from last night. 
Oh, but something
terrible has happened. 
You have to help me. 
Um, uh um, M-M-Miss Wu,
I'm... I'm... I'm in a meeting,
uh, per... perhaps we can
discuss this in... in class.
Cliff... 
Class, my ass. Give me that. 
Excuse me, please.
Uh...
Uh, what is it?
Thelma's in jail
and Smooth's gone
so you gotta help us... 
Give me that phone. 
Hi, Cliff, it's me, Karen. 
First things first,
You're gonna have to
get over here
as fast as you can
and help us out. 
This is an emergency... 
I've no time. Thanks.
I'm so sorry.
Where were we?
Uh, now obviously
there is no need
to stress
the importance
of the Rousehorn endowment...
Hello?
Hey, Cliff,
what's the big idea, anyway?
You know, after last night,
a person would think, well... 
What, were you using us?
Uh, uh, listen, I'm in a very
important meeting right now
with the faculty of my college
including, uh, my father,
the Chancellor...
Cliff... 
He's talking about his father. 
Shut up. 
This is Monica, birthmark... 
Oh. Excuse me.
Okay, now listen, I sent
Diavolo with the car... 
Uh, yo,
is Cliff Skridlow here?
Cliff, what's happening?
Hey, man,
I'm double-parked outside.
Well, you'll just
have to wait.
What the hell is
going on here, anyway?
Uh, he just
got here.
Uh, I'm so... I'm so sorry
about these interruptions.
Are we still in session
or is this a coffee break?
No, we are still in
session. We gotta go, bro.
I'm coming.
I... I'm coming.
I'll be there,
don't worry about a thing.
I'm... I'm on my way.
Vietnamese girl.
Distraught, distressed...
Uh, urgent, needs
immediate faculty counseling.
Uh, I'll be back.
"301."
"Robert. E.
Lee Davis-Jackson. "
I don't wanna hear
any more about it!
Every time I turn around,
you're up here
in front of me
on a traffic violation!
And if it
happens one more time,
you're gonna be spending
your declining years in the slammer!
Now, get out of here!
Next case.
A southern tyrant.
Uh, pardon me,
are you looking for a lawyer?
Uh, no.
Well, uh, would you like to
discuss it over a drink?
I know a wonderful cozy
little bar across the street.
No, thank you, I have
business with the court.
Thanks anyway.
Hmm.
Well, excuse me.
Sir, I have a business
proposition for you.
Mmm-hmm.
Would you be willing
to, uh, part with certain
elements of your
unique wardrobe
for a cash retainer?
Does that mean
sell my clothes?
Nah.
Lf, uh, look, i-if there were
thoughts in that direction,
I mean, what sort of offer
are we kind of talking about?
Well, I wouldn't
want to insult you...
You can't insult me.
You see, I'm a lawyer.
Talk best price.
I have repeatedly warned counsel
not to provoke
the court with all this...
Is this
Department 20 and one?
Step aside, lackey,
or you'll be eating my boot!
What is going on?
Exactly, your honor,
what is going on?
When a flower of the South,
a decent girl with