harassment.
How'd you get the name Snake?
What, you got a long wee-wee?
Sorry, man, but we gotta bust you.
- You ain't got no reason to bust me.
- We got 50,000 reasons.
Right. But you ain't got no crime.
I will be back.
Yo! Hey!
Yo. Hey. Yo!
Can I have your attention, please?
- This is a neighbourhood watch area.
- What's he doin'?
- Rich people make him crazy.
- There's a guy up here named Snake.
He's wearin' garage-sale clothes and
the top of his hair looks like a parakeet.
He also has $50,000
in small bills in a briefcase.
As his neighbours, you must make sure
there are no suspicious characters...
...or evil perpetrators lurkin' in the area
who would seek to do him harm.
Again, $50,000 in small bills. Tax free!
In a briefcase, in this apartment,
which has really cheeseball locks.
You can push in, bop him on the head,
take it... Nobody'll know.
So it's up to you.
Thanks a lot. Have a good day.
- Well said.
- You can't do that.
Yes, he can. What he can't do is undo it.
So, good luck at your chosen profession.
Yeah. Keep in touch, man.
Don't be a stranger.
Wait. Wait!
- You can't leave me here now.
- Sorry, Snake, but you're clean.
- You gotta arrest my ass.
- For what?
Thanks very much.
- Mr Hughes.
- Come on, man, come on. It's cold here.
Relax, Snake.
Mm-mm.
Saw Gonzales in a Mercedes.
Who's he workin' for?
Julio don't work for nobody.
His boss had an accident.
He fell on a knife four times.
- Those things do happen.
- It's a jungle out there.
Listen, you dimball, we got $50,000. Think
Gonzales was buyin' Savings Bonds?
Yeah, right. Yeah. Buy American.
Support your country. Shit like that.
- Could he be, maybe, importing cocaine?
- No, no, no. That would be illegal.
Hey. I got the right
to remain silent. Listen to this.
I hate the fact that Gonzales has
a Mercedes and we're in this tub of crap.
Yeah, it does lack a certain style.
- You know what?
- What?
Why don't we go to where Gonzales
lives and find out where he shops?
If he can afford a Mercedes,
maybe we can too.
But, now, where
are we gonna find $50,000?
I don't know.
If I were Gonzales, this is not
where I would park my Mercedes.
- How you doin'?
- All right. Where's the fire?
There is no fire. A jumper hit the sidewalk.
They hate cops here, so they call us.
I don't know why
they can't call Chicken Delight.
All right. I love fires.
Yeah?
Hey, man. What are you doin'?
I'll take this so you don't
make any bad investments.
That's my money! Hey, you!
Hey, man! You be careful with that!
- Watch the hose.
- OK.
- Well, look who's here.
- Hey, Garcia.
My favourite traffic cop.
- You give the body a ticket yet?
- Up yours.
- Fellas, fellas.
- Gruesome stuff. Does the lump have ID?
Nothin'. Not even a face. John Doe
meets Sheraton Road. Splat.
- Anybody see anything?
- Not around here. Nobody saw nothin'.
Nobody saw nothing? You mean
somebody got up on the roof...
...and said "Anybody looks,
I'm not jumping"? Come on.
Hey. You two weren't "questioning
a suspect" on the roof, were you?
That's cute.
Go put your nuts in a microwave.
- He jumped barefoot?
- Locals musta stole his shoes.
- His clothes are wet. Did they bathe him?
- The guy checked out. It's no big deal.
- Are you tryin' to drum up business?
- No, to arrest Julio Gonzales.
- If this is him, it would save a lotta grief.
- He's not around.
When he got out of Joliet, he had money.
Moved downtown for his new image.
Wants to be the next Al Capone.
- We gotta get this guy fast, man.
- Hey, what time is it?
- Ten to four.
- I gotta go say goodbye to Aunt Rose.
Callin' all cars. Callin' all cars!
UFO landed on Michigan Avenue.
(Danny) I should park inconspicuously.
(Snake) What is this?
Don't pull that psycho cop shit on me.
This is my Aunt Rose's funeral. One
wisecrack gets you your own casket.
- Leave me in the car. I don't want to go.
- Come on.
- What are we doing?
- Shut