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Mom said they found it
in an old house
on Shadowbrook Road.
But I can't read it.
It's all in German.
My sister takes German
in high school.
Your sister
doesn't speak German.
All she does
is hang around,
and the guys
touch her tits.
Your sister wouldn't
happen to live next-door,
would she?
So what?
That girl's
your sister?
So, what do you say?
Are we Monster Squad...
...or what?
All right.
How does that dog
get up here, anyways?
Old friend.
How do you like
your new home?
I must
sleep soon,
so listen
very carefully.
Van Helsing's diary...
...is missing.
I want you
to retrieve it
for me.
You understand?
Children...possess it.
I want you
to find them
and take the diary.
If they do not
...you will kill them.
Gentlemen, I'd just like
to say three words:
Scary German Guy.
Who else are we
gonna get to translate
this thing?
Come on. Somebody
go up and knock.
You knock.
You're our leader.
Firstly, he's scary, okay?
And "B,"
he's German.
Maybe he doesn't
even speak English.
Okay, so what's
German for...
"Please don't
murder us"?
Bitte, moerden-zie
uns nicht.
time is almost up.
It's your
last chance for pie.
Thanks, Mister, uh, guy.
Now, here we go.
I mean...
No, thanks.
So? Ja?
Now, where
were we?
Ah... ja.
"The amulet itself
is fairly small
and carved with
intricate symbols."
Rather an odd-looking
don't you think?
Scary German
Guy's bitchin'.
Sir, the thing
I don't understand is
the part about
the equilibrium.
Well, according
to this rather
curious book
you have
brought me,
"The forces
of good and evil--"
Uh, that is a B-17,
in case you are
It's rad!
"Good and evil
in constant flux,
"back and forth.
"Only once,
every hundred years,
are these forces
And what about
the amulet?
The amulet,
so nearly as I
can translate,
is "concentrated good.
"It is a talisman
which wards off evil
and is..."
how you say, uh...
That means
it can't be
Or, in any case,
normally destroyed.
and this part
is underlined...
every hundred years,
"at the stoke
of midnight,
"the amulet
becomes vulnerable,
"and at that moment,
it can be
And if it is?
Then the balance
good and evil
will shift,
and evil will rule.
However, our friend
Mr. Van Helsing
claims there is a way
to stop the forces
of darkness.
"If one
could gain possession
of the amulet
before those forces..."
every hundred years,
"at midnight,
"there is
another option:
"a ceremony which,
when followed
to the letter,
"will open a hole
"into Limbo itself
"where dwell
the damned;
"a vortex,
"which like
a great whirlwind,
"can swallow
the forces of evil
Well...does it describe
the procedure at all?
In detail.
This was the last entry.
On this date,
he was to battle
those forces himself.
It is
tomorrow's date,
one hundred years ago!
A hundred years ago?
Tomorrow night.
Thank you very much.
Bye. Thank you
very much
for all your time.
Thank you.
I expect
you boys thought
I was some kind
of monster myself?
A vampire, perhaps?
That's quite
all right.
But I am not,
you know.
If I were
a vampire,
then I wouldn't have
a reflection.
Now, would I?
Man, you sure know
a lot about monsters.
Now that
you mention it...
I suppose I do.
Guys, wait up!
Tomorrow night?
What do we have to
do again?
Blow a hole
in Dumbo?
Limbo, stupid.
So, how do
we know
the amulet's
there, anyway?
Because, you dweeb,
Dracula's obviously
here looking for it.
If we don't find it
before he does,
we're beast bait.
Okay, so,
say we get
the amulet.
Then what?
Wait till
We get
a virgin.
A virgin?
Okay, right.
Then what?
Well, our virgin
takes the amulet,
reads the
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