this is our 20th century mythology.
That's big.
I don't know.
I hope it lasts forever.
It's a good thing.
It's--It's, um...
As long as it's thoughtful,
it's a good thing.
And remember,
live long and prosper.
Man: Good night,
everyone.
Good night, all.
God bless.
I want to thank all of you
for my stamp,
And I want you to know
I'm a Trekkie, too.
I love Star Trek,
and all I can say is this...
& Glory, glory, hallelujah &
& Star Trek's truth
is marching on &
& lts truth is marching &
Ladies and gentlemen,
live long and prosper.
Uh-huh.
& On &
Thank you. Hah!
Thank you.
I am a big Star Trek fan
and got beat up most of my life
for being a Star Trek fan,
usually by sports fans,
which I think is ironic, 'cause, um...
someone that's, like,
really into football
will wear the uniform
of the game, a jersey,
and walk around town,
and that's fine.
Yet if I put on my Klingon uniform
and go to Safeway,
I'm a big f--king geek,
you know.
"Excuse me. These yams
have no honor."
I love their motto-- We boldly go
where no man has gone before.
But when they get there,
there's someone waiting for them.
James Kirk as an archaeologist.
Bones!
You know, there's supposed to be
this prime directive,
you don't tamper with cultures
because you're so advanced.
When you land on their planet, you don't
mess with any of their beliefs.
You just get that one thing
you need and you beam out.
He didn't pay attention
to that at all, man.
He would just burst into their
hallway, "Your bible is a lie!
Everything you believe is wrong.
Run! Freak out!
I'm the bloated God-being
from the sky."
They've always got one minority
that gets beamed down
that don't come back up.
It's like, "OK. Jim, Spock,
Bones, Scotty...
and Rodriguez."
Rodriguez is dead.
When they get down there, Jim goes,
"Rodriguez, check behind that rock.
Regular cast, stand over here...
'cause there's a brain-sucking
plant behind the rock."
We want Rodriguez to say,
"Hey, Jim, you check behind that rock.
I lost two cousins
on this show last season."
Remember the old one with the 3 brains
in the jars with the gambling problem?
Remember that? "l bet 400 quatloos
on the newcomer."
"Where are you from?"
"Earth."
"What's the spread
on the UCLA game?
Got a lot of quatloos on that."
One day you'll have Klingon comics.
Worf as a comic.
[Deep Voice]
"Thank you.
It's a pleasure to be here
at the first ice house on Klingon.
Remember when you were in school,
and your teacher would anger you,
forcing you to kill him?"
[Laughter]
"My father would be so proud of me,
he'd hold my hands
in the flames of Roqah."
"Scotty! How are the engines?
And don't use a metaphor."
"Aye, sir. The circuit board
is cross-wired
Iike a Christmas tree
on the Fourth of July."
"No, Scotty!
The engines, Scotty.
How are the engines?"
"Aye. They're overheated, sir,
like a supernova in the middle of August
with the windows closed."
"No, Scotty, no metaphors!"
"Can I use a simile, sir?"
"No!"
"An allegory?"
"No!"
"Can I tell an anecdote?"
"The Klingons are here!"
Weinhold: Remember Wesley,
the little kid?
14 years old,
he's never kissed anyone.
There's a holodeck
on the ship.
Now...if I had a holodeck...
when I was 14,
I never would have
left the thing.
They'd have to send
Captain Picard looking for me.
"Where's Weinhold?"
"He's in Holodeck One."
The doors open up,
I'm climbing out of a giant --.
[Laughter]
"It's time you saw
Counselor Troi."
"This is Counselor Troi!"