What 's the point of getting married?
You're married.
Yeah, so what?
-Do you have to spit on me?
-Sorry.
At home, I'm the king.
I'm Mr. Sunshine and Mr. Springtime
all rolled into one.
What 's so funny?
Who are you, anyway?
Who do you think you are?
-What did Tania do in Moscow?
-Lay off.
-Moscow isn't cheap.
-Shut up!
She didn't work in a factory!
Or a dairy!
-Shut the hell up!
-Cool it.
Relax.
All I'm saying is,
I feel for you.
Down by the mine...
Down by the mine
Once upon a time
There was a boy
who looked so fine
They took his hand
and made him sign
And sent him down
the coalmine
He sold his soul
to Russian Coal
Now the fine boy's
a mine boy forever!
I still have nothing
to give her.
I'll be your present.
Take me and give me, just as I am.
No wrapping, no ribbon.
Let 's get going.
The girls still love him
however!
There were 100!
I counted three times.
...91, 92, 93!
-There were 100!
-You ate seven meatballs!
Dad...
I know you're a Stakhanovite,
a Model Worker.
They always told me,
''Make him proud!''
-Calm down, Misha.
-But I'll tell you this:
you know nothing about love.
Love isn't measured in meatballs.
Twerp!
If you can't drink, don't!
He's entitled to!
He's getting married!
You've never understood the depths
of my soul and you never will!
The Communists
abolished the soul!
-Meatball?
-No.
Don't torture me with your fish.
In any case, I'm broke.
It 's a gift! A gift!
For the wedding!
We're not animals!
This must be it...
Tell me boys, what number is this?
Misha...
You're asleep.
Dead to the world.
Excuse me...
Do you like the songs
of Julio Iglesias?
-Who?
-Madam...
Knives going cheap!
-Add a shine to your table.
-Don't touch me!
I'm a stranger here.
And I haven't any money!
Personally,
I prefer Lolita Torres.
Gently. Don't rip my ear off.
I'll do it myself
-Can I go now?
-Sure.
Where'd you get them?
Thanks.
It 's cold!
Look at the state of you!
My darling, drunk fiancй...
How will I cope with you?
Like this.
Keep it together.
I'm not going to church.
It 's the latest craze.
All the bigshots go to church.
They'll be jailing
non-believers next!
I wouldn't put it past them.
Listen, son. Skip church.
Go straight to the town hall.
-Okay, Grandpa.
-Coming, coming!
See? We're late.
Come here, dear.
Take these wedding rings.
This one is your father's.
No, not that finger.
Like this.
And take mine.
It may not fit her.
She has such slender fingers.
It will, Ma.
Thanks.
Ma?
What 's the matter?
Don't cry.
It 's my wedding day.
Why are you crying?
Me and Grandpa
are getting married too!
-In church!
-Behave, you two!
Misha, it 's time.
Praise God!
Praise the Lord!
Tania...
These are for you.
A present.
What are you doing?
It brings good luck.
Hold it.
Tell me, Tania.
What if the coin had come up tails?
Would none of this be happening?
It did come up tails.
What do you mean?
What I'm saying.
I tricked you.
I cast my evil spell on you.
Like in school.
You're not invited.
Nobody sent for you!
Who the hell are you?
Comrade Lujina, come in!
Make way for our cashier.
And Comrade Pletniov,
the mine manager!
Welcome, Sir.
There's a place reserved for you.
Misha!
I sold the cement.
Here's the money.
Keep it, Weasel.
I don't need it anymore.
Come on in.
Bridegroom!
They won't let me in!
-Let him in, Dad. He's with me.
-You see!
Go in, host the party.
We'll hold them off.
-Even if it kills us!
-Thanks, boys.
Congratulations!
From the bottom of my heart!
Look what a treat
we have for you!
-Where do I put it?
-Later.
''These wedding rings
two destinies combine
Let your hearts forever
their strengths combine!''
Leave it to me.
Son!
There's a crate of vodka
under the bed. Get it!
What, now?
We're short of food!
Too many people!
We'll stun them with