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unflappable.
LAMBERT.: Did you just use
our one curse word?
WEITZ.: Was that our one swear word?
I don't think that counts, does it?
LAMBERT.: I don't know.
I'm not gonna say it again, though.
WEITZ.: Well, if I haven't,
I'm just gonna swear at you.
I think we get one swear word
in this entire commentary,
so I'm just gonna swear at you
at the end of this whole thing.
LAMBERT.: Okay, okay.
MAN 2 ON SCREEN.: Put your gun down
or I'm gonna blow your frickin' head off.
MAN 3 ON SCREEN.: Both of you put both
of your guns down
or I'm gonna blow both
of your frickin' heads off.
MAN 1 ON SCREEN.: All right, forget it,
let's do this!
(GUNS FIRING)
(MAN SCREAMS)
(GUNS FIRING)
(WOMAN SCREAMS)
Okay, l think l'm gonna throw up.
(SCREAMING CONTINUES)
He's...
(SCOFFS) What a marshmallow!
LAMBERT.: Always gets a line, that laugh.
WEITZ.: I think you just did a spoonerism.
''Always gets a laugh, that line, ''
you meant, surely?
-LAMBERT.: What did I say?
-Always get a line, that laugh.
-LAMBERT.: Did I?
-Yeah.
-LAMBERT.: Okay, can I explain why?
-Yeah.
LAMBERT.: It's 'cause
I haven't slept for 32 hours
'cause I flew back from Los Angeles
to London yesterday.
WEITZ.: Oh, I see. All right.
LAMBERT.: That's why.
There'll be more of those.
WEITZ.: Now, funny...
We just saw the premiere,
and people laugh when Bella disengages
her hand from Jacob's.
I think perhaps because girls feel
that's a very identifiable moment for them,
when a guy kind of gets a bit closer
than you are ready for them to be.
LAMBERT.: I would add that that is probably
a third mistaken moment from Jacob,
because I think he times it very badly,
-the hand-holding.
-WEITZ.: Yeah, what he should do is...
Well, I don't know.
I rather admire Jacob's persistence
at this moment,
because I think sometimes
if you're gonna go for it,
you should just lay out your case
and not try to play any games
and just tell someone
what you feel about them.
-I admire him for how he does that here.
-LAMBERT.: Okay. I'll retract that.
WEITZ.: Well, I don't know, I mean, maybe
you wanna go about it differently, Pete.
-It's up to you.
-LAMBERT.: Okay.
WEITZ.: But all I'm saying is that's, I think,
how I first got to date my wife,
-was just by being straight with her.
-LAMBERT.: Belligerent.
WEITZ.: And grabbing her.
No, it was by...
I said, you know, ''I like you and I think
''that we could have a relationship,
and I'd like to see if that's possible. ''
-LAMBERT.: Wow, that's amazing.
-Yeah.
-LAMBERT.: That's really touching.
-And it worked, I think.
-She's still here.
-LAMBERT.: I think it did.
WEITZ.: She's waving at me right now,
yeah, yeah.
LAMBERT.: Aw...
Should we explain that we're not
in the same room at the moment?
-WEITZ.: I think we did at the beginning.
-Oh, we did, really? Okay.
WEITZ.: Yeah. But, yeah,
you are connected via the magic of ISDN.
I don't even know
what the heck that means.
LAMBERT.: I'm not actually watching
the movie at the moment.
WEITZ.: All you can do is hear it,
so that's why occasionally
I describe what's happening.
LAMBERT.: Now, maybe we should
talk about the movie.
WEITZ.: Yeah, okay, now Jacob's doing
what he should do, I think.
LAMBERT.: Yeah, definitely.
WEITZ.: But Bella can't. Bella can't do it.
And this is a very sad moment here.
They're both trapped, really.
LAMBERT.: This music,
which is Jacob's theme,
has a great quality
of being kind of unresolved.
You get a lot with the music
that accompanies him
a sort of a repetitive motif
that never quite lands
where you hope it will,
which I think is a really nice way
-of illustrating Jacob's feelings.
-WEITZ.: Notice also, though,
if you go back about five seconds,
old Jacob had snuck his left hand
onto Bella's right knee.
-LAMBERT.: Yeah.
-You know, cheeky.
LAMBERT.: Yeah, there's a couple
of little cheeky continuity errors, as well,
if you wanna look carefully
around that area.
WEITZ.:
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