Professor has quite exceptional privileges anyway. We know about his work. We were going to leave him no less than five rooms... This is a disgrace. If there were a discussion now I would prove to this Pyotr Alexandrovitch... Pardon me, do you wish to open a discussion right now? I can understand your irony, Professor. We will leave now. Still, as chairman of the cultural department of this house I... - Chairwoman. - Chairwoman. ...I suggest that you buy some of these magazines sold for the benefit of the children of Germany. - Fifty kopecks a copy. - No. I will not. - But why not? - I don't want to. - You have no sympathy for the children of Germany? - I do have sympathy. - You grudge fifty kopecks? - No. - Why then? - I don't want them. You know, Professor, if you were not a luminary known throughout Europe... ...if you hadn't been interceded for by certain people in the most disgraceful way... ...you should be arrested. - What for? - You don't like the proletariat. - No, I don't like the proletariat. Zina, dear, do please, serve the supper. With your permission, ladies and gentlemen? Doctor Bormenthal, pray, leave the caviar alone, will you. I'd like to give you a piece of sound advice, pour yourself some Russian vodka... ...instead of the English vodka. - With the blessing of the state? How could you, my dear fellow. Darya Petrovna prepares excellent homemade vodka herself. I wouldn't say that, Philip Philipovich... ...everybody says that the new vodka is quite good, 30 proof. Vodka should be at least 40 proof, not 30, that's number one. And number two, one can never tell what muck they put into it nowadays. - Can you tell me what may occur to them? - Anything. That's just what I think. And now, Ivan Arnoldovitch, gulp this little bit at once. And if you tell me you don't like it, you are my sworn enemy for life. You don't like it? You don't? Answer me, dear Doctor. - It's excellent. - I should think so. Mind you, Ivan Arnoldovitch, that the only people, ...who take vodka with cold collations and soup are a few remaining landlords whom the bolshevicks didn't have time to murder. Anybody with a spark of self-respect takes his hors d'oeuvres hot. And of all the hot hors d'oeuvres in Moscow, this is the best one. Once they used to do them magnificently in "Slaviansky Bazar". There, take it. If you feed a dog at table, afterward you won't get him out of here for love or money. I don't mind. The poor thing's starved. Food, Ivan Arnoldovich, is a subtle thing. One must know how to eat. And yet just think of it that most people don't know how to eat at all. One must not only know what to eat, but when and how, and what to say while eating. If you care about your digestion, my advice is: ...don't talk about Bolshevism or medicine at table. And, God forbid - never read Soviet newspapers before dinner. - But there are no other newspapers. - So don't read any at all. I once made thirty tests in my clinic. And guess what? Those of my patients whom I forced to read "Pravda"... ...lost weight. And to top it off they had retarded knee reflexes, lost appetite... ...and exhibited symptoms of general depression. Yes. The difficult years of fighting for the liberty of this country are gone. The ones that follow them are also difficult. Zina, my dear, what's that noise? - They're having another general meeting. - What, again? Oh well, so it's started. This is the end of this house. Mow they'll get things rolling. First of all, there'll be community singing every evening, then the pipes will freeze in the lavatories... ...then the steam-heating pipes will blow up, and so on. You paint too grim a picture, Philip Philipovich. They're very different now. And I won't mention the boiler, my dear... Let them! When there's a social revolution going on, one does without central heating. But I ask you, why all this, when did
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