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operate on me, did l.
Neither did my relatives.
l guess l have the right to sue you.
o you object to having been turned
into a human being, do you.
Maybe you'd prefer to be sniffing
around garbage cans again?
Or freezing under gateways?
Why do you keep on at me?
Garbage cans, garbage cans!
Perhaps l was making my living there.
And what if l'd died under your knife?
What d'you say to that, comrade?
My name is Philip Philipovich.
l'm no comrade of yours!
Oh sure, l know. Of course,
how else, we're not your comrades!
How could we. We understand, sir!
We didn't go to universities.
We never had a flat of fifteen
rooms and a bathroom.
Only now it is time to forget
about all that.
At present everybody
has his own rights.
Use your fingers to catch fleas!
Use your fingers! l can't understand,
where you get them from?
You don't think l breed
them on purpose, do you?
l guess fleas just like me.
There is no time to weep
When we leave the stirrup and
take up the steel of labour.
There is one answer to every question
And there is no other.
l need some papers,
Philip Philipovich.
Papers? Damn.
- May be... H'm... Perhaps we might...
- orry, no.
You know yourself, that a man without
a document is strictly forbidden to exist.
To begin with, there's
the House Committee...
- What has the House Committee got to do
with it? - What do you mean? Everything.
Every time l meet one of them they ask me
when l'm going to get registered.
l can just imagine what you tell them.
l thought l told you not
to loaf around the stairs!
That sounds rather insulting.
Very insulting.
What am l - a convict?
What do you mean - loaf!
What does your precious
House Committee say, then?
There's no call to brand it 'precious'.
lt protects people's interests.
Whose interests, may l ask?
Everyone knows. The working
class element's.
Are you a worker then?
That's obvious, l am not a capitalist.
o how does the House Committee propose
to defend your revolutionary rights?
Easy. You ought to register me.
They say it is unheard of...
...that a man should live in Moscow
without registration.
That is for starters. But the most
important thing is to have a record card.
l don't want to be taken
for a deserter.
And then again there's the Union,
the Labour Exchange...
And how, pray, am l supposed
to register you?
You have got neither
name nor surname.
That is not fair.
l can very easily chose
a name for myself.
- l announce it in the newspapers and there
you are. - What do you wish to be called?
Poligraph Poligraphovich.
top playing the fool, l am serious.
l don't get it. l mustn't swear.
l mustn't spit.
Yet all l ever hear from you
is 'Fool, fool'.
l guess that in the RFR swearing
must be for professors only.
l beg your pardon. Your name struck me
as a little odd. Where, as a matter
of interest, did you dig it up?
The House Committee helped me.
We looked it up in the calendar.
They said: 'What do you fancy',
so l chose that one.
Zina, bring me the calendar
from the consulting room.
There could not possibly be anything
of the sort in any calendar.
Now you do surprise me, considering it
is hanging in your consulting room.
- Here you are.
- Where is it?
Just here. His day is celebrated
on March the fourth.
Yes, there it is... lnto the stove
with it. This moment.
And may l ask what surname
you will take?
urname? l don't object to my
hereditary surname.
Meaning?
harikov.
...As comrade Trotsky writes
in his numerous works...
the building of socialist society...
...is quite ensured internationally.
ln the capitalist world class
and economic contradictions...
...shall steadily increase.
Remember it once and for all.
Class struggle between the proletariat
and the bourgeoisie...
What should l write?
Nothing difficult.
Write a certificate, citizen Professor.
You know the sort of thing...
...This is to certify that the bearer is
really Poligraph Poligraphovich harikov.

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