You inherit $5 million.
The same day aliens land on the earth
and say they're going to blow it up
in two days. What do you do?
That's the stupidest question
I've ever heard.
Who's that guy in the coat
think he is anyways?
Bo Diddley?
Veronica's into his act, no doubt.
I don't know. Probably row out
to the middle of a lake,
bring along a bottle of tequila,
my sax and some Bach.
How very.
Come on, Veronica.
Later.
Definitely.
Let's kick his ass.
Shit, Ram, we're seniors, man.
We're too old for kind of that kind of crap.
Let's give him a good scare, though.
You going to eat this?
What did your boyfriend say when you told
him you were moving to Sherwood, Ohio?
Answer him, dick.
Hey, Ram, doesn't this cafeteria
have a "no fags allowed" rule?
They seem to have an open-door policy
for assholes, though, don't they?
What did you say, dickhead?
I'll repeat myself.
They won't expel him, they'll just
suspend him for a week or something.
He used a real gun.
They should throw his ass in jail.
(Veronica) No way. He used blanks.
All JD really did was ruin two pairs of pants.
Maybe not even that.
Can you bleach out urine stains?
You seem pretty amused. I thought
you had given up on high school guys.
Never say never.
What are you going to do, Heather?
Take the two shots or send me out?
Did you have a brain tumour for breakfast?
First you ask if you can be red,
knowing that I'm always red.
Shit.
It's your turn, Heather.
Easy shot, Heather.
No way, no day.
Give it up, girl.
- Holy shit.
- Incredible!
Whoo!
So tonight's the night. Are you two excited?
I'm giving Veronica her shot,
her first Remington party.
You blow it tonight, girl,
and it's keggers with kids all next year.
Why?
Why not?
Heather, your mother's here.
Come on, whoever wants a ride.
- Bye. Thank you.
- Bye-bye, girls.
Hey, take a break, Veronica. Sit down.
So what was the first week
of spring vacation withdrawal like?
I don't know. It was OK, I guess.
Hey, kid, isn't the prom coming up?
I guess.
Any contestants worth mentioning?
Maybe.
There's kind of
a dark horse in the running.
God, will somebody tell me
why I read these spy novels?
Because you're an idiot.
Oh, yeah, that's it.
You two...
Great pвtй, but I gotta motor
if I want to be ready for that party tonight.
Corn nuts!
BQ or plain?
BQ!
You're going to pull a super-chug with that?
No, but if you're nice,
I'll let you buy me a slushie.
I see you know
your convenience-speak pretty well.
Yeah, well, I've been
moved around all my life.
Dallas, Baton Rouge, Vegas...
Sherwood, Ohio.
There's always been
a Snappy Snack Shack.
Any town, any time, pop a ham and cheese
in the microwave and feast on a turbo-dog.
Keeps me sane.
Really?
That thing you pulled in the caff today
was pretty severe.
Yeah, well, the extreme
always seems to make an impression.
Did you say a cherry or Coke slushie?
I didn't. Cherry.
Great bike.
Yeah. Just a humble perk
from my dad's construction company.
Seen the commercial, right?
"Bringing every state to a higher state."
Wait a minute. Jason Dean.
Your pop's Big Bud Dean Construction?
It must be rough moving place to place.
Everybody's life has got static.
Is your life perfect?
Yeah. I'm going to
a Remington University party.
- Hmm.
- (Horn honks)
No, my life's not perfect.
I don't really like my friends.
Yeah, uh, I don't really like
your friends, either.
Well, it's just like they're people I work with
and our job is being popular and shit.
Maybe it's time to take a vacation.
Hello, ladies.
Throw your coats on the floor.
Veronica, this is Brad.
Excellent.
(Brad) Did you girls bring
your partying slippers?
- Let's party.
- She loves to party.
'Dear diary, I want to kill,
'and it's for more than just selfish reasons.
'More than a spoke in my menstrual cycle.
'You have to believe me.'
It's so great to talk to a girl
and not have to ask "what's your major?"
I hate that.
So,