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- 01-09

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I wanted you to wear the cardigan?
It makes me look older.
Look older?
Do you think this is a game?
Is that what you think this is?
I'm trying to give you a moral compass.
You have no moral compass.
You're going to walk into that courtroom,
and the jury's going to see
a mean, nasty, evil George Costanza.
I want them to see Perry Como.
No one's going to convict Perry Como.
Perry Como helps out
a fat tub who's getting robbed.
Do you think it's funny?
You damn right it isn't.
You better not be carrying on laughing
in that courtroom, funny man.
Cause if you start getting all smart-alecky,
making wisecracks, acting a fool,
you gonna find yourself in here
for a long, long time.
I don't like that tie.
Suzie, get one of my ties from my briefcase.
How do I look, Jackie?
Oh, you looking good.
You look strong.
You one fine-looking sexy lady.
Thank you, Jackie.
How 'bout me, Jackie?
Kramer, you always look good.
You got respect for yourself.
You're genuine.
Jury's going to pick up on that.
This one?
- That's right.
Do I have to?
Jackie says put it on, Jerry.
All rise.
Fourth District County Court,
Latham, Massachusetts is now in session.
The Honorable Judge
Arthur Vandelay presiding.
The judge's name is Vandelay?
Vanda who?
Jerry, did you hear that?
- Yeah.
I think that's a good sign.
Is the District Attorney
ready to proceed?
We are, Your Honor.
Mr. Hoyt.
Ladies and gentlemen,
last year, our City Council,
by a vote of 12:2, passed a Good Samaritan Law.
Now, essentially, we made it a crime
to ignore a fellow human being in trouble.
Now this group from New York
not only ignored, but, as we will prove,
they actually mocked the victim
as he was being robbed at gunpoint.
I can guarantee you one other thing,
ladies and gentlemen,
this is not the first time
they have behaved in this manner.
On the contrary,
they have quite a record
of mocking and maligning.
This is a history of selfishness,
self-absorption, immaturity, and greed.
And you will see
how everyone who has come into contact
with these four individuals
has been abused, wronged,
deceived and betrayed.
This time, they have gone too far.
This time they are going to be
held accountable.
This time, they are the ones who will pay.
Mr. Chiles.
I am shocked and chagrined,
mortified and stupefied.
This trial is outrageous!
It is a waste of
the taxpayers' time and money.
It is a travesty of justice that
these four people have been incarcerated
while the real perpetrator is
walking around laughing -
lying and laughing,
laughing and lying.
You know what these four people were?
They were innocent bystanders.
Now, you just think about that term.
Because that's exactly
what they were.
We know they were bystanders,
nobody's disputing that.
So how can a bystander be guilty?
No such thing.
Have you ever heard of
a guilty bystander?
No, because you cannot
be a bystander and be guilty.
Bystanders are
by definition innocent.
That is the nature of bystanding.
But no,
they want to change nature here.
They want to create a whole new animal -
the guilty bystander.
Don't you let them do it.
Only you can stop them.
Is the prosecution ready
to present its first witness?
We are, Your Honor.
Call Officer Matt Vogel to the stand.
Call Matt Vogel.
So they were just standing there?
Did one of them have a video camera?
Your Honor, with the court's permission,
we would like to play back that video
and enter it into evidence as Exhibit A.
Well, there goes the money for the lipo.
See, the great thing about
robbing a fat guy is, it's an easy getaway.
They can't really chase ya!
He's actually doing him a favor.
It's less money for him to buy food.
So they just stood there and did nothing?
Yeah, nothing.
No further questions.
Great plane!
Thanks a lot.
Piece of junk.
You know you almost got us killed!
 -  01-09  -  01-09


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