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that is important -
- it is what is in it that matters.
Laugh and the world laughs with you -
- sneeze and it is goodbye, Seattle.
Commercial: Hi, I am Earl Scheib
and I can paint that nose for $39.95!
Would you mind not bobbing your head?
The orchestra keeps changing the tempo.
Melodic: Everybody.
He has got the whole world in his nose.
Sympathetic: What happened?
Did your parents lose a bet with God?
You must love the birdies -
- to give them this to perch on.
Scientific: Say, does that thing there
influence the tides?
Obscure: Whoa,
I would hate to see the grindstone.
Well, think about it.
When you stop and smell the flowers -
- are they afraid?
French: The pigs have refused
to find any more truffles -
- until you leave.
Pornographic: Finally a man
who can satisfy two women at once.
- How many is that?
- Fourteen, Chief.
All right, religious:
The Lord giveth -
- and He just kept on giving, did he not?
Say, who mows your nose hair?
Keep that guy away from my cocaine!
Aromatic: It must be wonderful to wake
up in the morning and smell the coffee -
- in Brazil.
- Eighteen.
Appreciative: Oh, how original.
Most people just have their teeth capped.
All right...
You can do it, C.D., one more.
Your name would not be Dick, would it?
You smartarse son of a bitch!
You flat-faced, flat-nosed flathead.
Has he fallen yet?
Did that copy of
"Being and Nothingness" by Jean Paul...
Jean Paul Sartre? Yes, it did.
I have it here, it is paid for.
- Great, thank you.
- De rien... Il n'y a pas de quoi.
- Okay.
- Do not mention it, bro.
"Therefore, my body is a conscious
structure of my consciousness."
Thank you, Chris. I was too embarrassed
to go and ask for it myself.
A little light reading, Andy?
I got $9,000 for the house this summer.
- Which one of the five?
- The one on Rush Street.
- You are soaking Roxanne for $9,000?
- I am not.
- You like her, do you not?
- What is there not to like?
- Why do you not ask her out?
- No, I cannot.
I have a 3 o'clock and a
5 o'clock, the women are lined up...
Mostly because of the old saying -
- about a man's nose relating to
the size of...
- The size of what?
- Come on, everybody knows this.
Hey, Sophie. Do you know the old saying
about a man's nose?
You mean how the size of a man's nose
relates to the size of his...?
Oh, my God!
I love doing it to them.
- Your tea, sir... and picks.
- Thank you.
So, why do you not ask her out?
Sometimes I take a walk at night and
I see couples walking, holding hands -
- and I look at them and I think:
"Why not me?"
Then I catch my shadow on the wall...
- Why do you not get that nose job?
- I did.
It is the word: Rhinoplasty.
It is as unpleasant -
- as haemorrhoids.
Those two words you do not want
to get involved in.
What about cosmetics? Shading along the
sides, down the slope, a bit on the end?
- It really helps.
- No, not for me. I cannot wear make up.
You should have stayed last night.
You were great, we were impressed.
Roxanne went on and on about you.
She did?
I think she is falling in love,
but she does not know it yet.
What does she mean,
"she thinks she is falling in love"?
It has been known to happen.
C.D., this is Chris McConnell.
It is a pleasure meeting you. I am sorry
we have been missing each other.
Are you all right?
I know you have met the guys...
How is your room?
It is hypnotic, is it not?
It is huge!
It is enormous, it is gigantic...
They said it was big,
but I did not expect it to be BIG.
Do you want to shoot some pool?
Rack them up, we will play a game.
You will not kill me? The guys said...
- Ordinarily I would, but not today.
- Why not?
Because yesterday she did not,
but today... she does.
You finally have a sense of humour
about your nose?
Rack them up.
Okay, turn on the hose. The
Роксана Роксана

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