assault and battery would make sence.
Given you nature.
You do enough jail time to
convince anyone this is no setup.
You'll be on probation,
see a court-ordered shrink,
the whole nine yards.
If you wanna serve the
Commonwealth, this is your chance.
We need you pal.
You already pretended to be
a Costigan from south Boston.
Every weekend, sergeant.
Perfect.
Do it again.
For me.
THE DEPARTED
Are you Billy Costigan?
Yeah, who wants to know?
Own up. I know a Sean
Costigan down on L street.
That's my cousin.
He's connected. Not too bright.
- Yeah I know.
- I mean no offense.
- Billy?
- Yeah, it's me.
- Oh my God! Good to see you!
- Aunt Kathy! How are you?
Good to see you! Come on in.
He said you was in the Staties.
I couldn't believe it.
I got kicked out
like four months ago.
Yeah, it was in the papers.
So you know?
And why are we graced
with your presence?
Why your mother has
some pictures of my father?
Look at this smile.
My mother had them, my, uh...
My mother's dead.
Oh, sorry, sorry for your troubles.
I was at a funeral myself.
Miles Kennefick.
I knew him at school.
He's a young guy, you know,
it's terrible, it's a shame.
I remember... What a
night! That was a night!
Listen, listen!
I got like...
...like thirty thousand
bucks, right?
- Insurrance money.
- Yeah.
You know after my mother
passed and everything.
Yeah, yeah.
In your line of work if I gave you
like what say ten thousand?
What could I get back?
You know... You know what you
usually say at these moments?
What?
What?
Come on, man.
Oh come on, you
fuckin' morron, come on!
What, you want me to say it?
Huh?
I'm not a cop, all right?
I'm your fucking cousin!
You're bad!
You're corrupt, buster.
You must be my cousin.
Fucking 'ricans think
they know everything.
If they knew shit, they
wouldn't be Puerto Ricans...
Shut the fuck up
for five seconds, huh?
That's right. You used to be a cop.
When we're working together,
just try to limit it to two
eightballs an hour, all right?
We're not even
supposed to be doing this shit...
this close to worcester.
This side of worcester.
- Says whom?
- Says him, says Costello.
God says, as far as I'm concerned.
No, no, no he's no cop, he got
out of the joint three weeks ago.
Cunt cop.
No, no, no. He talks like his shit
don't stink, but he's good peole.
I knew his father.
I liked his uncle Jackie better.
Jackie was all right.
Uncle Jackie was excellent!
Fucking guineas.
- To Jackie!
- To Jackie!
Slainte!
Cranberry juice.
It's a natural diuretic.
My girlfriend drinks it
when she's got her period.
What, you got your period?
Hey, get your fuckin' hands off me!
Hey, hey, hey!
Do you know me?
No, no.
Well, I'm the guy who tells you
that there's guys you can hit
and there's guys you can't.
And that's not quite
the guy who can't hit
but he's almost
the guy you can't hit.
So I'm gonna make a fucking
ruling on this right now.
You don't fucking
hit him. You understand?
Yeah, excellent. Fine, fine.
I fucking know you.
I know your family.
You make one more
drug deal with that
idiot fucking cop magnet
of a cousin of yours,
and I'll forget that your
grandmother was so nice to me.
I'll cut your fucking
nuts off, you understand that?
Yeah. Yeah I do.
What are you drinking?
A cranberry juice.
What is it, your period?
Get him a cranberry juice.
Hey, fuckhead, it's Jackie's nephew.
Uuh.
What?
Uuh fucking what?
Get the fuck out of here.
Sorry, I'm late.
Staff sergeant Dignam is our
liason to the undercover section.
His undercover work is extensive.
He is here to give us his
report. Sergeant Dignam?
Ok.
My people are out there,
they're like fucking indians.
You're not gonna see them, you're
not gonna hear about them,
except from me and Captain Queenan.
You will not ever know the
identity of undercover people.
Unfortunatly this shithole has more
fucking leaks than the Iraqi Navy.
Fuck yourself!
- I'm