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fortune cookies at home.
When I'm old, one day
I'm gonna open them all up...
and see how my life turned out.
Hey, Swamp...
Baby, come here.
Come over here.
Look at that picture...
on the second floor,
right there in the middle.
- You like that?
- Yeah, I do.
Just wait right there, sugar.
What you mean, wait?
Hey, friend...
what do you call that action?
Trying to take
a painting off a wall.
I'd tend to call it stealing.
It's not stolen yet.
What did you do,
rivet it on here?
I can't get security.
Damn switchboard's closed.
You're working late, aren't you?
There we go.
Who the hell are you, anyway?
You can't be a burglar.
There's something familiar
about your face.
I am, too, a burglar.
Hell, no, you're not. Hey!
You're one of the Blakes.
It just came to me.
I've seen your picture
a hundred times...
in the social pages.
I even had a date
with your cousin Victoria once.
I'm Fred Kroop.
Fred Kroop?
No, you got the wrong fella.
You got to sign out.
I never did sign in.
You can't be here
unless you signed in.
Now, sign out.
Look, like I told you,
I forgot to sign in.
Where'd you get that picture?
From a fella named Kroop.
Look, if it's
that important to you...
I'll sign in and out
at the same time, how's that?
What you'll do is come with me
up to Mr. Kroop's office.
Something ain't right here.
I've got an appointment to make.
Something definitely
ain't right.
All right,
let's make this quick.
You are crazy.
You're absolutely crazy.
Some flowers for m'lady.
Let's get out of here.
It's sunflowers.
I thought it was a lion.
You'd never, ever, ever
get away with this...
in Prattville,
I'll tell you that right now.
- Be very cool.
- Never.
You know why?
Because my daddy was sheriff,
that's why.
Let's get out of here.
Come on. Come on.
Wait, you don't even
like this thing?
Sir, take this
to the nearest museum...
will you please?
Thank you very much.
Did you see what that crazy
son of a bitch gave me, huh?
Well, I'll take it.
OK, square the shoulders...
keep it tight down.
Now, shoulders back...
Keep the hip inside...
Tie the belt. Good girl.
OK, shoulders...
Down. Get down further.
Get down further.
OK, on defense...
70%of the weight
is in the back.
OK, ladies, let me
show it to you again, OK?
All right,
let's try it again.
Line up.
Terrific, terrific.
Pathetic. Take a break.
Say the precepts.
I don't know if it's me, them,
or I'm a bad teacher.
They can't even get position one
after three months of class.
But when they do get it,
look out.
They'll wipe out Birmingham
and everybody in it.
- Mrs. Clyde?
- Yeah.
She had an argument
with her husband...
about who's gonna take
the child to school.
So she chops him one
right in his private area.
Now they all want black belts.
Pretty soon they'll have
to invent a new color.
Gold, maybe or... pink.
How are things on the mountain?
Oh, Anita,
we're having the best time.
You know what we do?
We go outside--
Good. I'm glad
somebody's life is terrific.
Very nice,
Mrs. Clyde, very nice.
Thank you.
Ladies, let's see if
we can do as well as last time.
Here are your supplies
you asked for.
Goddamn it, Newton!
How many times
I have to tell you...
knock before you come in here.
Damn it,
I was doing my pushups.
All right, Joe, can you handle
a little more weight?
Here I come. Open up!
Ain't he wonderful?
Don't you just love him?
Joe, when are you gonna
take that mask off?
Oh, Joe...
I missed you.
There's my man.
How you been, Hal?
Fine, Craig, fine.
You expecting buffalo
up this way, or what?
No. Just a little maintenance.
Come on in.
You're looking good, Hal.
You're looking
all right yourself, Craig.
How are you?
Well, I've been busy.
Pretty busy.
Some of us have got
to earn a living, you know?
Why are you eating
that carrot like that?
It's good for your jaw muscles.
I eat ten of
these little
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