these words for a woman
who doesn't want sex -
'frigid', 'uptight',
'cold', 'icy'.
Can you think of one word
for a man who doesn't want sex?
Dead.
( DlSTANT SlNGALONG )
(Men sing) § Girl, l'm sorry
l was blind
§ You were always on my mind
§ You were always on my mind
§ Tell me
§ Tell me that your sweet love
hasn't died... §
Scary.
§ Give me... §
Must be...how you say?
§ Give me one more chance... §
Bonding.
§ To keep you satisfied... §
l've said it before.
lt's a tribal thing.
Go in boys and come out men.
(lmitates guitar)
§ Little things l should have
said and done... §
They'll be circumcising
themselves with sharp rocks
any minute now.
JABBER: Sing it, fellows!
§ You were always on my mind
§ You were always
on my mind... §
Getting some
serious rays there, Flip?
l'm moontanning, man.
Full moon.
You don't get 'em every day.
No, you don't.
Do you ever wonder
if it's all a big con, Flip?
Eh?
This. Everything.
What if none of it
really exists?
What if it's
like some big experiment,
and we're like ants
trapped in a giant Petri dish?
What if there's
a greater intelligence out there
and it's creating everything
purely as a way
of stopping us
going insane on them?
What if nothing really exists
until we sense it?
My...my room doesn't exist
until l walk into it.
Front yard doesn't exist
until l experience it.
You don't exist.
l don't...exist?
Well, you could be just
a projection of my inner psyche
materialised from my brain
in order to keep me company.
What about the cashmere
sweater babes over the road
with their swishy little skirts
and all?
Would they be
from your inner psyche or mine?
Probably yours, l reckon, Flip.
Took off a while ago
with some rugby types.
Losers, man. Forget them.
No. We're connected, man.
Once you have them
by the moonlight,
they never want to go back.
lt would mean
that when we close our eyes,
everything disappears.
And if we open them
fast enough...
..we might be able to catch
the greater intelligence out
and see that there's
actually nothing there.
What if l kept mine open
while you shut yours?
No, you're just
being stupid now, Flip.
lt doesn't work like that.
There may be some sort
of delay switch happening.
Tomorrow is the shortest day
of the year.
ln pagan times,
it would be time for the king
to be sacrificed...
..and for the queen to select
a new man to be her king.
May l?
Seems a bit rough on
the poor old kings, doesn't it?
lt was a great honour.
Their blood had to be poured
into the ground
to make the earth
fertile again
and the harvest plentiful.
Makes you sort of thankful
for crop rotation, doesn't it?
The female fertility cycle
is 28 days.
The lunar moonth is 28 days.
A month.
No, moonth.
The moonth is a lunar month,
the same
as a woman's fertility cycle.
1 3 moonths
fit exactly into one year.
At the end of the 1 3th moonth,
the king must die.
Oh, well. l guess
if it helps for the harvest...
When the patriarchy took over,
they abolished the 1 3th moonth
to stop
the killing of the kings.
That's why they say
1 3 is the unlucky number.
Why should
1 3 be the unlucky number?
Just because some man didn't
want to be bled to death.
l get very pissed off
about that.
Men are bastards.
l hear about
your secret weapon.
To make us go, how you say?
Gaga?
(Clears throat)
Uh, will you excuse me
for a moment?
GOATEE: l'm telling you, bud,
if this deal comes together,
it's just going to be
one long line of kneeling down,
dick-sucking motherfuckers
waiting for me to come along
and give them a taste
of the big fellow here.
How will you get
the designs on?
l don't see how you'll do that.
(Coughs)
Any fucker propeller head
can do the designs, bud.
Those lines
and dots they've got...
..can be changed
into, like, ridges and bumps
for added sensitivity.
Fucking guy's going to think
he's fucking Tarzan.
(Chuckles)
( BONG HlSSES AND GURGLES )
You got a