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softener.
- What?
- No kidding?
What a funny guy.
What else did you do
while we were away?
Just hung around.
Bring your stuff upstairs.
Shopping? He doesn't know how
to tie his shoe. He's going shopping?
Honey, what's this?
Kevin! What did you do
to my room?Where's my suitcase?
Who took my shirt?
Miss. Young lady!
Excuse me. Girls!
Hey, little fella. Hey!
Excuse me, girls. Girls!
Hey, big fella!
Help me make the beds
in the living room.
- Come on down here!
- Ma'am!
Hey, son!
Big fella.
Hey, little guy! Little guy!
Pete's brother
and his family are here.
Trish is going to Montreal.
Montreal? Oh, her family's there.
- Then we're off.
- When?
- Tomorrow.
- You're not ready, are you?
Uncle Frank won't let me
watch the movie...
...but the big kids can.
Why can't I?
I'm on the phone.
When do you come back?
Not till then?
It's not even rated R.
He's just being a jerk.
Kevin, if Uncle Frank says no...
...then it must be really bad.
No, we put the dog in the kennel...
Hey, get off!
Kevin, out of the room.
Hang up the phone and make me,
why don't you?
This kid.
Did you pick up
a voltage adapter thing?
No, I didn't have time.
- Then how do I shave in France?
- Grow a goatee.
Dad, nobody'll let me do anything.
I've got something, pick up those
MicroMachines that are all over.
Aunt Leslie almost broke her neck.
He was playing
with the glue gun again.
We talked about that.
Did I burn down the joint?
I don't think so.
I made ornaments out of fish hooks.
- My new fish hooks?
- I can't make them out of old ones...
...with dry worm guts stuck on them.
- Peter.
- Come on, Kevin. Out.
Do you guys have a voltage adapter?
Here's a voltage adapter!
God, you're getting heavy!
Go pack your suitcase.
Pack my suitcase?
- Where's the shampoo?
- I don't live here.
This many people here and no shampoo.
- Are your folks home?
- They don't live here.
Tracy, did you order pizza?
- Buzz did.
Excuse me. Are your parents here?
My parents live in Paris.
- Hi!
- Hi!
- Are your parents home?
- Yeah.
- Do they live here?
- No.
Why should they?
All kids, no parents.
Probably a fancy orphanage.
I don't know how to pack a suitcase.
I've never done it once.
- Tough.
- That's what Megan said.
What did I say?
You told him "Tough. "
The dope was whining about a suitcase.
What was I supposed to say?
"Congratulations, you're an idiot"?
- I'm not an idiot!
- Really?
You're helpless! We have to do
everything for you.
- She's right, Kev.
- Excuse me, puke-breath. I'm small.
I don't know how to pack.
- I hope you didn't just pack crap.
- Shut up, Linnie.
What should I pack?
Buzz told you, cheek-face.
Toilet paper and water.
What are you so worried about?
You know Mom's gonna
pack your stuff, anyway.
You're what the French call
les incompetents.
What?
Bombs away!
P.S. You have to sleep
on the hide-a-bed with Fuller.
If he has something to drink,
he'll wet the bed.
This house is so full of people
it makes me sick!
When I grow up and get married,
I'm living alone!
Did you hear me?
I'm living alone!
I'm living alone!
Who's gonna feed your spider?
He just ate a load of mice guts.
He'll be good for a couple weeks.
Is it true French babes
don't shave their pits?
Some don't.
But they got nude beaches.
Not in the winter.
Buzz?
Don't you know how to knock,
phlegm-wad?
Can I sleep here?
I don't want to sleep with Fuller.
If he drinks, he'll wet the bed.
I wouldn't let you sleep in my room
if you were growing on my ass.
Check it out.
Old man Marley.
Who's he?
You ever heard of
the South Bend Shovel Slayer?
No.
That's him.
In '58 he murdered his family
and half the people on his block...
...with a snow shovel.
Been hiding out
in this neighborhood ever since.
If he's the Shovel Slayer,
how come the cops don't arrest him?
Not enough evidence to convict.
They never found the bodies.
Everyone

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