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because it's gone.
Fuller! Go easy on the Pepsi.
Kev! Kev, get a plate.
- Passports!
- Watch it!
No, no. Get these passports
out of here.
Are you okay, honey? Come here.
Are you all right?
What is the matter with you?
He started it!
He ate my pizza on purpose.
He knows I hate sausage and olives...
Look what you did, you little jerk!
Get upstairs now.
You're such a disease.
- Shut up!
- Kevin, upstairs!
- Say good night, Kevin.
- "Good night, Kevin."
Why do I get treated like scum?
I'm sorry. This house is just crazy.
We've got all these extra kids
running around.
My brother's in from Ohio.
It's nuts.
How come you didn't bring
more cheese pizzas?
Nice tip. Thanks.
Having a reunion?
My husband's brother transferred
to Paris. His kids are still here.
He missed the family,
so he invited us to Paris...
...so we'll be together.
You're taking a trip to Paris?
Yes, we leave tomorrow morning.
Excellent. Excellent.
If you'll excuse me, this one's
a little out of sorts.
Don't worry about me.
I spoke to your husband.
And don't worry about your home.
It's in good hands.
There are 15 people, and only you
have to make trouble.
I'm getting dumped on.
You're the only one acting up.
Now get upstairs.
I am upstairs, dummy!
The third floor?
- Go.
- It's scary up there.
Fuller'll be up in a little while.
I don't want to sleep with Fuller.
He wets the bed.
He'll pee all over me. I know it.
We'll put him somewhere else.
I'm sorry.
It's too late. Get upstairs.
Everyone in this family hates me!
Then ask Santa for a new family.
I don't want a new family. I don't
want any family. Families suck!
Stay up there. I don't want
to see you again tonight.
I don't want to see you
for the rest of my life.
I don't want to see
anybody else either.
I hope you don't mean that.
You'd feel pretty sad if you woke up
and didn't have a family.
No, I wouldn't.
Then say it again.
Maybe it'll happen.
I hope I never see any
of you jerks again!
I wish they would all just disappear.
- Where are they?
- I don't know. She said 8 sharp.
We slept in!
Hi, I'm Mitch Murphy.
I live across the street.
You guys going out of town?
We're going to Florida.
Well, first we're going to Missouri
to pick up my grandma.
You know the McCallisters
are going to France?
Do you know if it's cold?
- Do these vans get good mileage?
- Kid, I don't know. Hit the road!
Do a head count.
Get everyone in the vans.
Where are the passports?
I put them in the microwave to dry.
How fast does this go?
Does it have automatic transmission?
Does it have 4-wheel drive?
Look, I told you before, kid.
Don't bother me. Now, beat it!
Line up in front of the van.
- Line up and shut up!
- Wow!
Shut up!
I need a head count.
One, two, three...
Eleven, 92, 12...
Buzz, don't be a moron.
Six, seven, eight...
...nine, 10, 11.
Okay, half in this van,
half in this one. Let's go.
Have a good trip.
Bring me back something French.
There's no way we'll make this plane.
It leaves in 45 minutes.
Think positive!
You be positive.
I'll be realistic.
Excuse me, your power is fixed...
...but the phones are a mess.
It'll take a couple of days to fix...
...especially around the holidays.
- Thanks.
Did you count heads?
Eleven, including me.
Five boys, six girls,
two drivers...
...and a partridge in a pear tree.
Hold the plane!
- Did we miss it?
- You just made it.
Single seats only in coach.
Take whatever's free.
I get a window seat!
- Kids are in coach, we're first class.
- Seats Four A and B.
Four A and B. I'll take your coats.
- Fasten your seat belts.
- Champagne, please.
- It's free, isn't it?
- Oh, yes.
We made it.
Do you believe it?
Hope we didn't forget anything.
- That's real. It's real crystal.
- Yeah, so?
- Put them in your purse.
- Frank, I can't do that.
Just... Put them in your purse!
Yeah. Fill it up.
Fill it up.
Fill it up, please.
Thank you.


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