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carcass out my door!
She's rat bait.
Merry Christmas, you filthy animal.
And a happy New Year.
We know a cat
who can really do the cool jerk
Well, this cat they talkin' about
I wonder who could it be
'Cause I know I'm the heaviest cat
The heaviest cat you ever did see
When they see me walkin' down the street
When the fellas want to speak
Hey, hey
On their faces, they wear a silly smirk
'Cause they know I'm the king
of the cool jerk
Get out of here, you nosy little pervert,
or I'm gonna slap you silly!
You're cooking, Frankie!
Didn't look this bad on our honeymoon.
Hey! Uncle Rob lives here.
If they're back from Paris,
I'll drop in on them.
They usually give pretty good presents.
Good night, Mom.
Good night, Kevin.
Your drawers, sir.
Jeez! Don't flash these babies
around here!
- There could be girls on this floor!
- I was very careful, sir.
You can't be too careful
when it involves underwear.
- I understand.
- I'm sorry. You wanted a tip.
That won't be necessary, sir.
I still have some tip left over.
No tip? Okay.
No, no, no! Wait, wait, wait!
Excuse me, how do I get
to Columbus Circle?
The doorman will be happy
to find you a taxi, sir.
Mr. McCallister!
- Excuse me.
- Sure.
And how are we this morning?
- Fine. Is my transportation here?
- Out in front, sir.
A limousine and a pizza,
compliments of the Plaza Hotel.
I do hope your father understands that
last night I was simply checking the room
to make sure everything was in order.
- He was pretty mad.
- He was?
He said he didn't come
all the way to New York
- to get his naked rear end spied on.
- Of course not.
- Will he be down soon?
- He already left.
I would have liked
to have offered my personal apology.
If some guy looked at you in the shower,
would you ever want to see him again?
I suppose not.
I don't think you'll see him
for the rest of our trip.
I understand.
Have a lovely day.
- Morning, Mr. McCallister.
- Good morning.
Mr. McCallister,
here's your very own cheese pizza.
- Hello?
- Hello.
- Know any good toy stores?
- Yes, sir!
Get out of here! Go on, get out!
Get out of here! Go on. Get out of here!
Beat it, beat it, beat it! Get out of here!
Hey, Marv! Get over here!
I got to talk to you!
Whoa! Whoa!
- Would you like a scarf?
- You wanna forget about the scarf, Marv?
We got to talk.
We don't have the equipment
to pull off anything big,
you know, your banks,
your jewelry stores.
We don't want goods.
We need cash, and we need it now.
How about hotels?
Tourists carry lots of cash.
There's no guarantees. I got a better idea.
Stores ain't gonna deposit cash
on Christmas Eve.
The only stores that are
gonna have cash on hand
are the ones that deal
in moderate-priced goods.
Right, right.
Ergo, what store's gonna make
the most cash on Christmas Eve
that nobody's going to think to rob?
Candy stores.
Nine-year-olds rob candy stores, Marv.
This is what I had in mind.
That's brilliant, Harry. Brilliant!
Yep. There's nobody dumb enough
to knock off a toy store on Christmas Eve.
Yes, there is.
Here we are, sir, Duncan's Toy Chest.
Merry Christmas, Kevin.
This is the greatest accident of my life.
Marv. Marv!
Hey, nice house,
but there's no bathroom in it.
- All right, so what's the plan?
- Everybody leaves for a nice holiday off.
We come out of our little houses...
- Yeah, then what?
- We empty the registers
- and walk out like we own the joint.
- Great plan, Harry!
Shake his hand.
Well, now, thank you
and merry Christmas.
Say hello to the family.
Yes. Let me see.
You shopping alone?
In New York?
Sir, I'm afraid of my own shadow.
- Now, I was just checking.
- That's very responsible of you.
- Well, thank you.
- My pleasure.
That'll be $23.75.
My, my, my!
Where did you get all that money?
I have a lot of grandmothers.
Well, that explains it.
This is a really nice store, one of the finer
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