everyone said you were dead.
They said, "Dan is dead."
I said, "No, no, no. He was my best friend.
"He would have called me for the funeral."
Hello, Litko.
All right, shut up now.
You cut the small talk, all right?
Now, I got a deal for you.
I got you here some tall fountain glasses.
- Where did you find those?
- You like that?
I got you matching banana boats.
And will you take a fucking look at this?
This shitload of Fiestaware, all yours,
with the low, low, low, low Litko discount.
- Yeah. How much?
- Yeah, I don't know. 100% off.
- Bernie, I can't do it.
- Hey, come on, 100% off.
I can't do any better than that.
Take it or leave it.
- Bernie, I can't.
- I stole it.
- You did not.
- That's great, Dan. That's really great.
I tell you I'm a thief, and you call me a liar.
Nice guy.
What's this? Menu?
A pink menu? Pink?
Yo, Litko!
Hey!
- Thanks.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
$4.95 for a burger?
I can get a burger down the street
for a buck and a half.
No parking.
Ain't gonna catch me around here.
Hey. Awnings. Nice touch, Danny.
The place ought to do okay.
You'll meet a nice girl,
you'll settle down, you'll get married.
Then she'll divorce you
and steal all your money.
Listen to this.
"You learn from your mistakes.
"Man is the one animal
that has that capacity."
- Right.
- "And in the end, what do you have?
"You have your friends."
I mean, it's not really therapy.
It's like a workshop.
- Come with me.
- No.
Don't you think that it's about time
you tried helping yourself?
Look, this is not me helping myself.
This is you helping myself.
Deborah, this workshop was made for you.
I mean, just a simple weekend
dealing with rage and anger.
With men and women sharing,
working out their hate.
I'm sick of hating. Don't you understand?
I mean, God, Joan,
I don't think I have any more hate left.
Yes, you do. You just don't know it.
Just wait a second. Come back here.
Let me tell you something about yourself.
You and this psychobabble brochure
are just full of shit.
You knew that I was in love with Danny,
and you did everything in your power
to break us up.
So don't you dare tell me about friendship!
I am such a bitch.
How do you put up with me?
If I didn't love you so much,
I'd throw you out the window.
- Will you look at the nips on this one?
- Where?
- T-shirt, blue shorts.
- Yeah.
- Are you kidding me?
- Yeah.
- Are you fucking kidding me?
- Yeah, yeah.
- Are you pulling my leg?
- Yeah.
That is a sensitive lady.
- I think I can see her beaver.
- No shit? Really?
- I'm telling you.
- Get out of here.
- I'm telling you, look.
- Get the fuck out of here.
- See? See?
- I can't make it out.
- When she bends over. Top of her legs.
- I know where it is. I just can't see it.
When the little flap goes up there.
You gotta look real close.
That pisses me off.
That fucking pisses me off.
I mean, where does she get off
with that noise?
I mean, coming to the ballpark,
bending all over the ballpark.
I mean, just flaunting her body.
I mean, what's a fellow supposed to think?
I mean, a fellow comes out here to play ball.
Am I wrong?
I mean, we're talking about space.
Recreational fucking space!
- Feeling all right?
- Well, how do I look? Do I look all right?
- You look fine.
- Well, then let's assume I feel all right!
All right?
Will you look at those...
Shit. It's what's-her-name.
Just pretend you don't see her, that's all.
Don't look at her, man.
Deborah?
- You dickhead, now she sees you...
- Bernie, for Christ's sakes!
The way I see it,
either you can stay here
and continue to blame me,
or you can go talk to him
and only have yourself to blame.
Perfect.
- Hey, guys.
- Hi.
Hi.
- Bernie, could you excuse us for a minute?
- Sure. Go ahead.
- Come on, man.
- What?
- Come on, don't be a jerk your whole life.
- What?
She said don't be an asshole your whole life.
Wait a minute. You're trying...
You want to talk. Go ahead. You