Crichton is alive.
One more time.
Begin again.
Fine.
For the 89th time.
Once upon a time,
there was a boy named John.
And John was an astronaut.
He lived in a faraway place
called Earth.
Which is so far away,
you've never heard of it.
One day when John was out
doing astronaut things,
a big blue wormhole
gobbled him up and spat him out
at the far end of the universe.
- Things were looking grim in Mudville
- Canaveral?
Till our hero met
an amazing living ship,
made some nice new friends
and he hooked up
with his dream girl.
We could've lived happily ever
after, but the Peacekeepers
raped, chased and tortured us
for years on end.
Fire!
Then two months ago, we got
our asses shot off again.
This time it was the Scarrans,
big reptiles. Oooh!
And Moya, our living ship,
limped her way to your
happy planet for a little R&R.
Because we figure, it's empty!
Hey, no one is gonna bother us.
We're gonna have a baby!
- Will you marry me?
- Yes.
Next thing, me
and the future Mrs. Crichton
are having a private moment
when you guys fly by.
Boom bada-bing,
squiggly line, squiggly line.
Crystallized.
And it's two months later.
What?
Retreating.
Scorpius has powered off
his onboard beacon.
We have no way
of tracking him.
Broadcast this order.
Highest priority.
The instant his command carrier
is spotted, it is to be fired upon.
No hailing,
no offer to surrender.
I want this coward Scorpius
and all who fly with him
erased from existence!
Aye, Chancellor.
Scorpius is many things, Maryk.
None of them good.
But a coward? Never.
He has initiated this war,
and then turned and run!
How do you define
cowardice, Grayza?
Grand Chancellor,
please consider my counsel
on this carefully.
Hatred of the Scarrans
is Scorpius'
sole consistent trait.
There is something else.
Perhaps.
But my orders stand.
- Funny how?
- Different.
Different how? Like ice cream
cucumber different?
I don't know.
That's why I'm here.
All right. Everything
is gonna be okay.
Do you know why?
Because we're done.
We're checking out.
Next Ferengi we see, we run.
No questions later.
From this moment on,
my one concern, my life
is you
and our baby.
Are you sure?
- What?
- Is she all right? The baby all right?
Doc says he doesn't know
what you're talking about. There is no baby.
What?
Whoa, whoa! What do you mean, no baby?
Ah, if there was
a little passenger before,
it ain't aboard the train
no more.
Doc says you
never were pregnant.
- I was.
- She was!
She was preg...
You were pregnant?
I was pregnant!
There is no baby.
No. Nothing.
Whoa!
We were in pieces,
thousands of pieces.
Rygel said he got every single piece off of the
ocean floor.
- Rygel.
- He was very thorough.
We made sure of it.
Even carried the pieces
up in his stomach
to make sure
he didn't drop them.
Congratulations, mate.
You are a mother!
- Oh, no!
- It's all right.
The wee babe
is doing just fine.
Yes, but it's doing
just fine inside me!
This is not happening.
- Do something.
- Hands off, missy.
The fee.
The fee is going up.
You take it out of him,
and you put it back in her.
Whatever it takes.
Won't do it.
Won't? I want this thing
removed immediately.
It's not a thing!
Fine. I want this miracle
of life out of me!
All right.
At the end of
the first quadmester.
The baby's too small now.
Fragile.
First quadmester?
Give me a drink!
Hey, princess, the nar's
in your stomach? Drad.
- What does it feel like?
- You tell me.
Hey!
Weeber eggs? I hate them.
Well, apparently babies
love them.
Actually, Rygel, what does
it really feel like?
Like having a parasite,
a large parasite
that's growing!
Okay, what did we do
to piss off the locals?
- They're paranoid.
- No, wrong, not paranoid.
I've been talking to many
of them.
Stark our ambassador?
No wonder they're avoiding us.
What's their