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I know. He's my father.
- Your dad is Damian Drake?
- Yes!
I'm kidding, relax. We did that.
I say, listen up, y'all.
Please put your greasy,
buffet-shoveling hands together...
for our next act.
If you've heard her before,
you're not here now.
So, I say, let me introduce you...
to Miss Dusty Tails.
Can I talk to you?
What the...
Dusty, I gotta talk to you.
- I'm Damian Drake's son, D.J.
- What?
How do I know it's you?
You are Damian's son.
Is there someplace we can talk?
- Excuse me, I have to change.
- Okay, toots, hand over the diamond.
- He brought a goose?
- It's duck, thank you.
- Hi.
- You again.
Listen up, you darn imbeciles!
We gotta get them varmints
and what they come for!
- And then we blast them?
- Then we blast them.
Now if I were a giant diamond,
where would I be?
Well, not there.
- My dad's in trouble...
- Not here.
...and he said that
I should ask you about the Blue Monkey.
- So then you know?
- Definitely. Yes.
I figured something must have happened
when he didn't show up.
I'm sorry,
but that's what comes with being a spy.
So, you're a spy, too?
The pop diva thing?
That's just one side of me.
I also work for the Agency.
Professional assassin.
It's really hard
trying to juggle the two sometimes.
I don't know what I'll do when I have kids.
Do you know how hard it is to find a nanny
with advance weapons training?
How many galoshes died
to make that little number?
What about this Blue Monkey?
Your father was assigned to track it down
before the chairman could.
The diamond has supernatural powers.
It would be a disaster
if it fell into the wrong hands.
I was supposed to give him this.
This is not a king-sized diamond.
This is a queen of diamonds.
What kind of sick joke is this?
- Can I have that?
- Very funny.
That is so sweet.
You trying to take over for your father.
These evil forces? They're bad people.
Relax, sister. I don't know
the meaning of the word "fear."
Say your prayers, duck!
Fear: noun. A state of terror.
This mission
needs years of experience and training.
Maybe. I ain't got time for that right now.
I gotta go save my dad.
Don't lose that card. It's important.
After him, boys!
Easy on the feathers.
Come back here, you card-carrying coyote!
Dadburn slapstick cliche!
Faster! Climb like my life depended on it.
You run, I'll steer.
Right! I mean, left. Your other left.
That's what I'm talking about!
Is that all you got?
That's gonna leave a mark.
That's not boxing. Bite his ear!
Left and a right and a left and a right-left!
I'm gonna come up on you.
I'll take that playing card.
- After it, stunt boy.
- Man.
All right, when I say,
place your bets, gentlemen.
Money plays, loser stays.
Everyone's a... Not everyone.
Here's my money. Now play.
- Card, sir?
- Hit me.
Don't you want to
look at your cards first, son?
Boy's about as sharp as a bowling ball.
- Hit me.
- No, hit me first!
I said await your turn, sir.
Hit me.
No, hit me, fragnabbit!
- He's the boss.
- You son of a...
Card, sir?
Hit me.
Twenty-one, a winner!
Let's go!
"And then they made their heroic escape!"
I say we do Cirque du Soleil
and call it a night.
How about the Liberace Museum?
All right, let's see what this baby
can really do.
Now, that's an interesting feature.
Come back, you absconders!
Watch yourself, ma'am.
I love this rug.
- Come back here, you varmints!
- Run. Move. Go.
Nice car.
Don't hit me.
It's a modified Chevrolet
with a big 24 on the side.
Out of the way, fancy boy.
I'm a-commandeering this here clown car.
After them, boys!
Rag-flagging ragtag sidekicks!
Slow down, will you? I'm waddling here.
Come back, you darn idiot galoots!
There's gotta be 314 hotels
and 142 casinos in Las Vegas.
We are never going to find that duck.
Daff never misses a cue.
- What's up, duck?
- Don't you start with me.
Excuse me.
- You.
- Him.
- Her.
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