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begging you not to beg me.
I'm off.
The poet came back home
after a lavish party
I've come, my precious one,
I'm coming home.
I have come,
I have come.
I see, the key's in the shoe.
Key, come out!
It won't.
It means I gambled it away.
Could I lose my apartment as well?
Complete with my wife?
How horrible!
Unfortunately, the movie camera was late.
The most interesting thing remained off-screen.
Concierge!
A drunken lout.
I envy your freedom so much.
I wonder if I could be just as free as you are,
could you marry me?
- Of course.
It's so good when you don't have to hurry
home, don't have to lie or make excuses,
don't have to think what time it is now.
- By the way, what time it is now?
Well, can't be over 12.
- 5 o'clock in the morning!
- How can it be, 5?
- God damn it!
- What have I done?
What about me?
What do you have to do with it? You're free!
- Am I? What about my wife?
What wife? You said you're a bachelor!
- No time to think of it now.
- He's married! This is base!
- Home... home.
The hooks are in the front.
And you, with her, with your wife,
in this very bed, in this bedroom...
- Where is your wife now?
- In the country house.
Where is my hat?
- You were hatless.
- I was hatted!
You were everything-less.
Home at last!
It's me, pussycat. Don't be afraid.
We went on a little spree.
Pussycat, where are you?
Are you asleep?
Couldn't wait for me.
Kitty, where are you?
Andrey! A man is in here!
Where?
- Where's the man?
- Over there, in the bed.
A male specimen in my pussycat's
bedroom?
- Who are you? Introduce yourself!
- I'm a cuckold!
- Just a sec, I'll get dressed.
- Give me back my things.
- Madam, please confirm it.
- Yes.
- These are my things.
- They're mine.
- Are they yours?
- They're mine!
Yours? You won't see them, then!
Don't you dare to throw away
other people's things!
My robe!
Now, get out!
- It's locked.
- Then open it!
The key.
Where's the key?
The key was in the robe thrown
away by that idiot.
He doesn't hear it. He's dead drunk.
Could I leave through the back door?
It's under repairs. Long been
locked!
The balcony.
That's what remains!
- Well, I'm gone or what?
- Go.
Listen, why do you have to whistle?
Let me whistle some.
Away with you!
I'm tired of whistling. Is he a
doorman or what? He won't answer!
Whistle!
Get up! Get up immediately!
I'm tired!
Mommy dearest!
Stop, you criminal!
Spare the furniture!
I'll break everything!
Throw him out of here, milksop!
Turn on the light! I can't see
his throat in the dark!
Excellent. I'll strangle you with
the electricity on!
- Let us rest awhile!
- Let's do it.
Could you bring us some water?
Vodka would be better.
- Isn't it the 5th floor?
- No, it's the 3rd!
Why should I get here, then? It's
not my bedroom!
- Hell knows! - Why do you swear?
We're not acquainted.
And he's asking if this is the 5th
floor!
But I know you. You're Madam Chuguyeva.
What a nice surprise.
How do you feel, Madam Chuguyeva?
You've probably made a mistake!
She's not a Madam, and she's not Chuguyeva!
- Liar! I recognized her.
- How dare you?
- And you're the crook, right?
- It's outrageous!
In this case, we'll fight a duel.
- Andrey, he has a revolver.
- Why a revolver?
Let's go to the Gypsies, to the
islands!
God, am I drunk!
- What could we do?
- We're trapped.
- He had to come in here somehow.
- He must have a key.
- How can we get it. He's armed.
- And dangerous.
- Are you ready to fight a duel?
I'm... Not ready. I must absent myself.
Listen...
I'm begging you.
We're ready to fight a duel with
you, but some other time.
Come to think of it, I'm completely
undressed. And you are fully clothed.
In essence, I have only a shirt on.
- What is the matter then?
- It embarrasses me.
- Are you embarrassed by the shirt?
Take it off then.
- Undress yourself!
Yes, let's undress, all of us.
I'll take my clothes off, too.
Above all, one should be

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