we weren't in school, I'd waste you.
Can you hear this?
You want me
to turn it up?
Hey, fellas, I mean...
I don't like my parents, either.
I mean, I don't...
I don't get along
with them when their idea
of parental compassion...
is just, you know,
wacko, you know.
Dork.
Yeah?
You are a parent's
wet dream, okay?
That's the problem.
Look, I can see you
getting all bunged up...
for them making you wear
these kind of clothes...
but, face it, you're
a neo-maxi-zoon-dweebie.
What would you be doing if
you weren't out making
yourself a better citizen?
Why do you have to
insult everybody?
I'm being honest,
asshole.
I would expect you
to know the difference.
Well, he's got a name.
Yeah.
Yeah?
What's your name?
Brian.
See?
My condolences.
What's your name?
What's yours?
- Claire.
- Claire?
Claire.
It's a family name.
- Oh. It's a fat girl's name.
- Oh, thank you.
You're welcome.
I'm not fat.
Not at present, but I can see you
really pushing maximum density.
You see, I'm not sure if you
know this, but there are
two kinds of fat people...
there's fat people
that were born to be fat...
and there's fat people
that were once thin,
but they became fat.
So when you look at them,
you can sort of see
that thin person inside.
You see,
you're gonna get married.
You're gonna squeeze out
a few puppies, and then...
[Grunting]
Oh. Obscene finger gestures
from such a pristine girl.
I'm not that pristine.
Are you a virgin?
I'll bet you
a million dollars that you are.
Let's end the suspense.
Is it going to
be a white wedding?
Why don't you just shut up.
Have you ever kissed
a boy on the mouth?
Have you ever
been felt up...
over the bra,
under the blouse...
your shoes off.'...
hoping to God your
parents don't walk in?
Do you want me to puke?
Over the panties...
no bra...
blouse unbuttoned,
Calvin's in a ball on the front seat...
past 11:00 on a school night?
[Andrew]
Leave her alone.
I said leave her alone.
- You gonna make me?
- Yeah.
You and how many
of your friends?
Just me.
Just you and me.
Two hits.
Me hitting you.
You hitting the floor.
Anytime you're ready, pal.
I don't want
to get into this, man.
Why not?
Because I'd kill you.
It's real simple.
I'd kill you...
and your fucking parents
would sue me,
and it'd be a big mess.
I don't care enough
about you to bother.
Chickenshit.
[Switchblade Clicks]
Let's end this
right now.
You don't talk to her.
You don't look at her.
And you don't even
think about her!
You understand me?
I'm trying to help her.
##[Radio]
Brian, how you doing?
Your dad work here?
Uh, Carl?
What?
Can I ask you a question?
Sure.
- How does one become a janitor?
- You want to be a janitor?
No. I just want to know
how one becomes a janitor,
because Andrew here...
is very interested
in pursuing a career
in the custodial arts.
Oh, really?
You guys think
I'm some untouchable peasant,
serf, peon, you know?
Maybe so.
But following a broom around
after shitheads like you...
for the last eight years,
I've learned a couple of things.
I look through your letters.
I look through your lockers.
I listen to your conversations.
You don't know that, but I do.
I am the eyes and ears of
this institution, my friends.
By the way, that clock's
20 minutes fast.
[Andrew Chuckles]
Shit.
## [Whistling]
## [Whistling]
## [All Whistling]
[Whistling "Beethoven's
Fifth Symphony"]
All right, girls.
That's 30 minutes for lunch.
Here?
Here.
I think the cafeteria would be
a more suitable place for
us to eat lunch in.
I don't care what
you think, Andrew.
Uh, Dick?
Excuse me, Rich. Will milk
be made available to us?
- We're extremely thirsty. Sir.
- I have a really low
tolerance for