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- 01-06

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you please?
That show of force,
Was that all about
humiliating dad?
Your honor, the police
pulled over some kid
And found a baggie
with cocaine residue.
They also found
a gun loaded
With hollow-Point bullets
on the floor.
Now in order
to beat the rap,
This 16-Year-Old punk
Claims he saw my client
Drop that weapon. And
mind you, not yesterday,
But over two years ago,
Using it in the meantime
to shoot at cans
And impress his friends.
I gotta tell you, Phil,
you look fantastic.
- As in science fiction?
- No. What? Come on.
Fucking empty compliments. I had
major fucking coronary disease.
- He's not shitting you, Phil.
- I broke my fucking gazz in Florida
On that goddamn recumbent
bike, I'll tell you that.
Would I shit you?
You're my favorite turd.
Fucking kid.
Why don't you get
a real bike,
Have some beach pussy
to look at
While you're
working the heart?
Go over the handlebars, have some
fucking head trauma? That's all I need.
I'm 66 years old.
Anyway, Phil,
welcome home.
Thanks.
Don't listen to me.
I'm a cranky fuck lately.
- Lately?
- Ooh!
Why don't you get
a bike, you fat fuck?
Ho...
- how are you, doc?
- Let me get a drink. I'll be right back.
All right.
Glad you're back, Phil.
This fucking guy.
How you doing?
I'm here to enjoy
my grandchildren,
My home.
Did you hear the news?
Pork chop out in Jersey
Got pinched on
a weapon charge.
Drops a gat in a field somewhere
three fucking years ago.
- What the fuck?
- Jersey. Fucking farmers, I don't know.
Yeah, he was probably going
down on some sheep or some shit.
Gun violence is a blight
on essex county,
And Mr. Soprano
will be prosecuted
To the fullest extent
of the law...
you know what
that says, htor?
That's your mommy's
name-- Blanca.
Blanca blanca blanca.
That's mommy's name.
AJ, can you
turn that off, please?
Tony.
Take the yellow ribbons down,
everybody. Our boy's come home.
- Dad.
- Hey. I'm fine.
They let him
out already?
What she means is, in our neighborhood
people don't get out right away.
- Hello.
- Where's Christopher?
I don't know.
I thought he was here.
Hold on.
It's Bobby.
- Yeah.
- You want me to come down?
No, nothing a hot shower
won't fix.
Carm told jan you were on
the fence about the weekend.
I don't know.
Sit around, chew the fat.
We got the meeting
with the canadians.
Ton', with these hassles, you
should make it up our way here.
You know, maybe that's
not such a bad idea.
Mr. Federal attorney.
- What can I do for you?
- You had to have your cheap headline, huh?
Can you really not be aware
we've been building a Rico case
Against Tony Soprano
for five fucking years?
Then you blow this
popcorn fart.
Are you gonna relax?
It's just all this
little stuff,
Like my phone has
one little bar up here.
I mean, what if the broker's
trying to contact me?
Caravan for my house is on
Tuesday, and the gas is still off.
Mine works.
- Hello.
- Essex county dropped the charges.
I told you it was
a piece-Of-Shit case.
Two years old,
no decent prints.
Santa Claus could have
dropped that gun in the snow.
They dropped the charges.
Well, I'd say I owe you one,
But I'm sure
it's more than one.
Neil, thanks again.
Thank God. I really didn't want
it hanging over your birthday.
Can we forget already
that it's my birthday?
You say that and then you get
upset if nobody makes a fuss.
- Hi.
- There you are.
I was starting
to get worried.
Traffic was horrible.
- I've had to pee since glen falls.
- Well, go.
Hey, sis.
"National lampoon's
vacation."
How you doing?
How are you?
You know, I gotta
admit it-- Every time,
Once you're up here,
It's pretty great.
Aren't you adorable too
With your matching dress
just like mommy's?
- Hi, Mercedes.
- Hello.
It's your favorite uncle.
There she is.
It's that little girl,
But I forget her name.
- Gladys?
- Nica.
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  -  01-06   -  01-06

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