on a shelf in the planetarium...
Skripach! You kleptomaniac!
You brought us a gravitsapa!
Patsaks! Patsaks!
Why are you standing performing here?
You have to stand there.
The Etsilops won't allow us.
You can only kneel here.
So what if we're here...
You've still got to pay us.
Alright, come on...
Come on, obey the rules.
Uncle Vova, your jacket is coming,
and my hat.
Hi!
How are things?
Anything new happened...on Pluke?
Sing!
We seem to be out of voice today.
Sing!
Vladimir Nikolaevich,
I can't do any more...
Don't worry, Skripach.
How much is that?
One hundred.
Seems like we've sung enough.
And what's that there?
Fifty.
Etsilpo!...
Patsaks!
Why aren't you wearing muzzles?
Turn round!
Orders of Mr PJ - all Patsaks
to wear muzzles...
and be glad.
So, that's for me and that's for you.
And that's for you.
Why aren't you glad? I demand to know.
Pick up your own gun, Chatlanian.
Put them on, then...
I'm doing it...
I'm glad. Ho ho.
Oh look, PJ's coming!
Where?...
Get up!
Get up!
Open your mouth!
Wider!
Skripach, gag!
Quickly!
Turn round!
Nose!
Give me the money!
Okay...Make sure they stay there,
like so...
And you can get rid of these!
If you think, that this idiot won't
tranklucate you,
it'll be the last though
in your Chatlanian head!
Use the shortest route... through
the atrium...arch!
Everyone lay down for half an hour!
Forwards!
Forwards!
Quickly!
Excuse me Grandma...
Mama PJ
Did you see it?
Yes.
Everyone quickly now...in the pool!
Open the door.
And stay there for 24 hours!
Do you Koo or not?
Here...
What number?
The last one.
Hello...
Hey, Chatlanian! Sing!
Finish, Skripach...
Wheel out the last but one.
Vanish!
Hello, Gedevan Alexandrovich.
Bastard!
Get out.
I can't.
They'll catch us.
Stop!
We have a gravitsapa.
Cut it.
Right here.
Throw your weight on it!
Uncle Vova! Help me roll the tub out!
Leave it!
Vladimir Nikolaevich!
Because of one stone from the moon
mankind wasted a thousand years,
and here's a living alien, and etsik...
made of an unknown metal.
Leave it, I said!
Tsapa.
We have a tsapa.
Operate the tsapa!
It's working!
So are we flying?
Seems like it.
Brothers! Be quick! They're after us now!
Don't interfere.
She's landed.
Where?
Hanut.
And what's Hanut?
The planet I was born on.
And me.
Night.
It's always night here, now.
Time to put this on.
Why?
There's no bloody air.
So how do you live here?
Nobody's lived here for years.
The Pluke's trankluked it
while we were on an expedition.
Why?
Because we didn't have time
to do them first.
And why would you want to do them?
So that they weren't hanging over our heads.
And everybody perished?
Of course.
Vovka, I've a suggestion.
The planet Hanut is only worth kopeks now.
63 chatls.
We go and sing 'Mama' around the galaxy
for a month,
then the planet is ours.
And another month - we can buy air.
93 chatls.
There will be no air for anybody
who comes here...
The air will be ours.
They'll be crawling around,
and we'll be spitting on them.
Why?
For fun!
Where's the fun in that?
You're too young to know...
Half the planet's yours, half ours. Okay?
Tempting, of course...
But we need the Earth, guys.
We have to hurry. The supermarket closes
in half an hour.
Vovka, you don't ...
Just look.
We're here.
And there's the Earth.
And here's Alpha.
They make cactuses from us on Alpha.
Earth's in the anti-tenture, my friend.
And there's no way that we can reach it,
understand?
How's that so?
Just is. All my life I never went.
It's not possible for a pepelats to get to Earth.
Enough of this bollocks!
Is it clear?
Let's divide the planet up.
You found this out in the planetarium?
Yes, my friend.
...therefore you stole a match?
Of course.
They're lying, Uncle Vova.
Don't believe them.
Now, take us to the Earth, that's all!
No, Gedevan, they're not lying.
They'd crawl across the whole universe
for these matches...