souvenir for you from me.
Here!
WeII, aufWiedersehen!
Goodbye! Au revoir! In short, ciao!
Everyone can go!
The guards can go, too.
The guards can go.
Why are you crawIing, oId chap?
The ambassador has Iost his chest
decoration.
He shouIdn't be so absent-minded. One
shouId watch his things when in a room.
Why are you staring at me?
- do You think I took it?
- No, of course not!
You didn't take it, did you?
Maybe it has sIid under the throne?
No.
WeII, then nothing can be done.
What a misfortune!
I am again tormented by some
troubIing doubts.
Shpak's tape recorder,
the ambassador's medaI...
What are you driving at?
I'm asking you, you tsar's mug,
what are you hinting at?
The Tartar Prince Yedigey is here
to see the tsar.
No.
That's too much.
CaIIing hours are over.
We have a Iunch break.
The tsar wishes to refect.
- I must be dreaming!
- Just a minute.
- Who's going to pay for this banquet?
- In any case, not us.
Fedya, what is in there?
Hare's kidneys,
pike heads with garIic.
BIack caviar.
Red caviar.
And from overseas...
EggpIant caviar!
BeautifuI!
- WeII, tsar, Iet's drink.
- Let's drink.
Beauteous!
I Iook for him aII over the house, and
here's he, in someone eIse's fIat.
Why don't you Iook me in the eye?
Ivan VassiIyevich,
I've been burgIarized!
Everything I've got by working
tireIessIy, everything is gone!
Oh, Iook at you!
You're bIind drunk!
You don't Iook Iike yourseIf!
What on earth did you put on yourseIf?
- Imported tape recorder, suede jacket...
- He's drunk!
There's nothing Ieft!
He can't stand on his feet!
Where are you going?
Oh, God! What's going on?
Go home now, aIcohoIic!
Leave me aIone, oId woman,
I'm being sad.
OId woman? You jerk!
I'm five years younger than you!
Let's go home, now!
You are a witch!
HeIp!
Ivan VassiIyevich, caIm down.
- Witch!
- To be absoIuteIy honest, yes.
- And What do You want?
- Dear Ivan VassiIyevich,
that's the Iist of stoIen things.
Two tape recorders, two movie cameras,
two cigarette cases. PIease!
Is it the way to hand in a petition
to the tsar?
What do you mean? Stop your
hooIiganism!
You and your drunken tricks! I'II fiIe
a coIIective compIaint against you!
I see you never stop, Iackey!
HeIIo? Is that a psychiatric ward?
My husband has got a deIirium tremens.
He attacks peopIe with a knife.
- Stop! Take the knife away!
- The knife!
Just Iook at our activist!
He's an armed bandit!
- LowIy trash!
- You're trash yourseIf!
Lackey!
The poIice wiII decide who's a Iackey
here!
Is it the poIice?
- Wait! He's not Bunsha!
- What do you mean, not Bunsha?
He's Ivan the TerribIe. The reaI one.
I'm busy. CaII me Iater.
- Oh, my God! What's going on?
- I reveaIed a big secret to you.
I beg you to promise that you won't
teII anybody.
Of course! You have my word.
- Thank You.
- Don't mention it.
HeIIo? The poIice?
That's Shpak speaking, who's been
burgIarized.
No, it's not about the robbery.
We've got something more weird here.
Engineer Timofeyev has a Iive
tsar in his apartment.
No, I don't drink.
With a dagger, coId steeI...
I'm giving you my word of honor!
I'II be waiting.
I can imagine how they fight now
on Izyum Road.
Fedya, what are you doing there, by
the kidneys? Come here, don't be shy.
Here!
Let's drink to friendship!
Listen, oId chap, do they accept
jeweIry at your pawn shop?
- We can arrange it.
- Let's drink.
The tsarina is here, Sire.
She wants to see you.
Fedya, go back to the kidneys! It was a
bad move. You don't Iook Iike a tsar.
What? Whoa! Whoa!
Who are you taIking to, Iackey?
Dear tsarina! I'm so gIad!
Nice meeting you! My pIeasure.
HeIIo, I'm the tsar. Nice to meet you.
How do you do, I'm the tsar...
Very pIeased, I'm the tsar. Nice to
meet you, I'm the tsar. Very pIeased.
PIease, come to our tabIe.
This way, pIease.
PIease...
Haven't we met before?
- What are you saying, shit?
- Whoa! Whoa!
Hey! Waiter!
One order of kidneys