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THOSE WHO CRY #
# A FANTASY #
# FOR A MILLION LADIES #
# BUT HE SOMETIMES #
# WONDERS WHY #
# BUT HE'S A MAN #
# A STRONG BUT SIMPLE MAN #
# STANDING PROUD #
# AND WALKING TALL #
# WITH A LONGING #
# FOR LIVING #
# NEVER TAKING #
# JUST GIVING #
# HE'S A MAN
THAT NO ONE REALLY #
# SEES AT ALL #
Roger:
YOU SAID YOU COULD DO IT.
I REWROTE THE SCRIPT BECAUSE
YOU SAID YOU COULD DO IT.
WE REARRANGED
THE SHOOTING SCHEDULE.
WE SPENT A DAMN FORTUNE
PREPARING FOR THAT STUNT
BECAUSE YOU SAID
YOU COULD DO IT.
I WAS WRONG,
ROGER. I'M SORRY.
YOU WERE WRONG.
HE WAS WRONG, MAX.
HE'S SORRY.
HE BLOWS A WHOLE
GODDAMN MOVIE
AND HE SAYS,
"GEE, I WAS WRONG. SORRY."
OK, OK, NEW BUSINESS.
SKI DOES IT WITH
SOMEONE ELSE, THAT'S ALL.
WHY DON'T YOU
FORGET IT, ROGER?
I NEVER LIKED
THE DAMN GAG ANYHOW.
WHO ELSE
CAN DO THE STUNT?
BUDDY JOE
CAN DO IT.
HE'S NOT AVAILABLE.
WHO ELSE?
NOBODY.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN
NOBODY?
I MEAN NOBODY!
IT'S A VERY COMPLICATED,
VERY SPECIAL STUNT!
THERE'S MAYBE 3 GUYS IN
THE COUNTRY THAT CAN DO IT
AND WE'RE NOT AVAILABLE.
SKI'LL DO IT SOLO
WITH A DUMMY THEN.
GODDAMN, ROGER!
IF YOU KNEW WHAT THE HELL
YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT,
YOU'D REALIZE IT TAKES
2 GUYS TO DO THE STUNT.
ONE GUY TO DRIVE THE CAR,
ONE TO READ THE INSTRUMENTS.
AND I'M TELLING YOU
THAT SKI ISN'T QUALIFIED!
MAX, DOES THIS MAN STILL
HAVE A JOB ON THIS PICTURE?
SONNY WORKS HERE
AS LONG AS I SAY SO!
OR AS LONG AS
SONNY WANTS TO.
THANK YOU,
MAX.
IF SONNY SAYS SKI CAN'T
DO IT, I BELIEVE HIM.
IT'S ONLY A DAMN MOVIE
ANYHOW, FOR GOD'S SAKE.
"ONLY A MOVIE"?
I WANT YOU TO CALL
THE STUDIO BRASS.
I WANT YOU TO TELL THEM
AND THEIR STOCKHOLDERS
AND THEIR DISTRIBUTORS
AND THE BANK
THAT IT'S ONLY A MOVIE!
WILL YOU DO THAT, MAX?
I WANT YOU TO TELL THEM
"FORGET ABOUT ALL YOUR MONEY,
IT'S ONLY A MOVIE!"
I'LL TELL THEM THAT NO DAMN
MOVIE IS WORTH A MAN'S LIFE!
AND I'LL TELL THEM THAT UNLESS
I CAN SHOOT THIS PICTURE
THE WAY I WANT TO,
AND THAT MEANS THIS STUNT,
THEN I TAKE A WALK.
AND WE'LL SEE WHO WALKS,
MR. BERNS...
YOU OR I.
I'M SORRY, MAX.
OH, WHAT THE HELL,
SONNY.
WHAT THE HELL.
YOU KNOW
THE OLD SAYING...
Both: "YOU'LL NEVER WORK
IN THIS TOWN AGAIN."
UNLESS
THEY NEED YOU.
THERE YOU GO,
CULLY.
THANKS. IF YOU'RE STILL MAD,
I CAN JUST LEAVE...
SHUT UP AND
SIT DOWN.
KIND OF EARLY IN THE DAY
FOR THAT HARD STUFF, ISN'T IT?
I'M WORKING OUT.
I'M WORKING ON MY
LEFT ARM THIS MORNING.
I'LL GET AROUND
TO MY RIGHT ARM
THIS AFTERNOON.
YEAH. YOU'VE HEARD WHAT'S
HAPPENING, HAVEN'T YOU?
I'LL TELL YOU
WHAT'S HAPPENING.
THAT NEW KID, SKI, THEY
GOT HIM GAFFING THE SHOW.
YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE?
I'LL TELL YOU WHAT ELSE.
THEY CANCELED THAT CAR STUNT.
AT LEAST TEMPORARILY.
YOU WERE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT.
IT'S A 2-MAN STUNT.
AND THERE AIN'T NOBODY CRAZY
ENOUGH TO RIDE WITH THAT KID,
ESPECIALLY WITH NO ROCKET
STRAPPED TO HIS BUTT.
AND YOU CAN BET
YOUR ASS,
YOUR COWBOY HAT,
AND YOUR HOUSE CAT,
THEY'RE GONNA BE COMING AFTER
YOU TO GET YOU TO DO THE STUNT.
YOU GONNA DO THE STUNT?
YOU KNOW WHAT, CULLY?
THERE'S A WHOLE NEW BREED
OF STUNTMAN COMING ALONG.
THEY'RE YOUNGER...
STRONGER...
TOUGHER THAN US.
THEY DON'T TAKE PILLS,
THEY DON'T DRINK,
THEY DON'T...
THEY DON'T TAKE SHOTS.
THEY USE LITTLE
POCKET CALCULATORS.
WE DON'T WATCH OUT,
THEY'RE GONNA BLOW US
RIGHT OUT OF THE TUB.
YOU DIDN'T ANSWER MY QUESTION.
YOU GONNA DO THE STUNT?
Max: BOY, I NEVER REALIZED
THERE WERE SO MANY GAGS
AT THE END OF THE PICTURE.
SO INVOLVED. FIRE GAGS.
WHOLE TOWN BEING BLOWN UP.
50 STUNTMEN DOING FALLS.
ALL RIGHT, MAX...
WHAT'S THE REAL REASON
YOU CAME OUT HERE?
TO ASK ME TO COME BACK
AND GAFF THE SHOW?
IT'S THE ROCKET CAR GAG,
SONNY.
THE ROCKET CAR.
IT'S A 2-MAN JOB JUST
LIKE YOU ALWAYS SAID.
NOBODY IN TOWN
WILL TOUCH IT,
AND ROGER'S WORRIED
THE SKI'LL GET HURT.
THAT'S BULLSHIT.
ROGER'S WORRIED ABOUT
GETTING THE SHOT.
ROGER'S WORRIED ABOUT
FINISHING HIS PICTURE.

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