quick.
Hey.
This looks okay to me, Cameron.
Looks great, let's roll.
Here you go. Nice job. Thank you.
You're a very generous individual.
Come back anytime.
- Right, okay. Watch the seat.
- Thanks a lot.
Sorry.
- Have a good night.
- Bye, you guys.
- Yeah, see you later.
- Later.
Yeah, man, we gotta do this again.
Look, this...
This is not a phony phone call.
There is an intruder, male,
Caucasian, possibly armed,
certainly weird, in my kitchen.
Yeah, my, my... My name's Bueller.
It's real nice that
you hope my brother's feeling better,
but I'm in danger, okay? I am very cute.
I am very alone.
And I'm very protective of my body.
I do not want it violated,
or killed, all right?
I need help!
Speak-a de English?
Dickhead.
God.
Excuse me.
Whoever's in the house
is still in the house,
I'd like you to know that
I've just called the police.
So if you have any brains whatsoever,
you'll get your ass out of
my house real quick.
I'd also like to add
that I have my father's gun
and a scorching case of herpes.
Hey, wait, wait, wait. That's my car!
I'll move it!
He got my keys!
You shithead!
I feel pretty good.
- Yeah?
- I feel real good.
Those guys... Those guys were nice,
huh? At the garage.
I was a little worried about them.
Turned out good.
Hey.
- Cameron?
- Yeah?
How many miles did you say
this thing had on it when we left?
One hundred and twenty-six
and halfway between
three and four-tenths.
Why?
How many miles are on it now?
Here's where Cameron goes berserk.
Cameron. Are you okay? Cam?
Cameron, cut that out.
Who is it?
Oh, I'm sorry.
I can't come to the door right now.
I'm afraid that
in my weakened condition,
I could take a nasty spill
down the stairs and subject myself...
God bless the police.
I'm saved. Oh, thank you, God.
Thank you, thank you. You are the best.
Have a nice day.
Thank...
I heard that you were feeling ill.
Headache, fever, and a chill.
I came to help restore your pluck
'cause I'm the nurse who likes to...
This may very well be for real.
I think Cameron might have blown
a microchip or two.
He's always been a little keyed up.
All I wanted to do
was give him a good day.
We're gonna graduate
in a couple of months and then
we'll have the summer.
He'll work and I'll work.
We'll see each other at night
and on the weekends.
Then he'll go to one school
and I'll go to another.
Basically that will be it.
Sloane's as big a problem.
She still has another year
of high school.
How do I deal with that?
I was serious when I said
I would marry her.
I would.
Cameron? Cam?
Can you hear me?
Cameron?
Blink if you understand me.
Cameron has never been in love.
At least nobody's ever been
in love with him.
If things don't change for him,
he's gonna marry the first girl he lays.
And she's gonna treat him like shit
because she will have given him
what he has built up in his mind
as the end-all,
be-all of human existence.
She won't respect him.
'Cause you can't respect somebody
who kisses your ass.
Just doesn't work.
Ferris. We better try something else.
This isn't working.
You feeling any better, Cameron?
Cam, why don't you come in here?
It's really nice.
Cameron, I could flip out real easy, too.
It's okay.
Sooner or later
everybody goes to the zoo.
Maybe he's really sick.
Maybe he isn't just torturing himself.
Hey.
Hey, hey.
Hey, Cameron.
Cam. Cameron, wake up!
Come on, wake up. Hey, wake up.
Oh, shit, Cameron, come on. Cameron!
Come on, wake up!
Hey.
What is that?
Ferris Bueller, you're my hero.
- You're kidding?
- Wow, that was pretty impressive, man.
You bitch. Oh, you son of a bitch.
Come on.
Tarzan.
Sheena!
Drugs?
Thank you, no. I'm straight.
I meant, are you in here for drugs?
- Why are you here?
- Drugs.
I don't know why I'm here.
Why don't you go home?
Why don't you put
your thumb up your butt?
You wear too much eye make-up.
My sister wears too much.
People think she's a