It's Ed Rooney, Ferris.
I'd like to have a word with you.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I can't come to the door right now.
I'm afraid that
in my weakened condition,
I could take a nasty spill
down the stairs and subject myself
to further school absences.
Save it, Ferris. Come down here.
You can reach my parents
at their places of business.
Thank you for stopping by.
I appreciate your concern
for my well-being.
I am not leaving till you come down
and talk to me, Ferris.
Have a nice day.
You're in big trouble, buster!
Get down here!
Ferris.
Ferris!
Who is it?
You know goddamn well who it is!
Oh, I'm sorry.
I can't come to the door right now.
I'm afraid that
in my weakened condition,
I could take a nasty spill
down the stairs and subject myself
to further school absences.
You can reach my parents
at their places of business.
Thank you for stopping by.
I appreciate your concern
for my well-being.
Have a nice day.
Damn it.
Oh, mud.
Bueller, you son of a bitch.
My shoe.
Damn it.
Oh, shit.
Not sure about this family.
Hi, doggie.
Stay, boy.
No, no. Stay. Stay.
Sit.
Sit.
Heel. Stay.
And passing the reviewing stand now,
Silbernen Ritter Drum and Bugle Corps.
The United German-American
Male and Female Caucus.
The Empire German-Americans.
It's getting late, buddy,
we better go get the car back home.
- What?
- What do you...
We have a few hours.
We have until 6:00.
I'm sorry, I mean, I know you
don't care, but it does mean my ass.
- You think I don't care?
- I know you don't care.
Oh, that hurts, Cameron.
- Cameron, what have you seen today?
- Nothing good.
Nothing...
Nothing good? This...
What do you mean, "Nothing good"?
We've seen everything good!
We've seen the whole city!
We went to a museum,
we saw priceless works of art.
We ate pancreas.
Saw... What?
What's wrong?
Look over there.
What's he doing?
He's licking the glass and making
obscene gestures with his hands.
What?
Don't! Don't.
He didn't leave.
He's probably doing something.
No, it really busts my hump, you know?
Oh, Cameron, he didn't ditch us
or anything. He's here.
For all we know,
he went back to school.
He would not go back to school.
Yeah, he'd do it.
He'd just do it just to make me sweat.
No, he would not. Cameron, come on.
Makes me mad.
Ladies and gentlemen,
you're such a wonderful crowd.
We'd like to play a little tune for you.
It's one of my personal favorites
and I'd like to dedicate it
to a young man
who doesn't think
he's seen anything good today.
Cameron Frye, this one's for you.
- Ferris! Get off of the float!
- What are you doing?
Get off the float! I can't believe you.
How'd you get up there?
You're out of your mind!
You know, as long as I've known him
everything works for him.
There's nothing he can't handle.
I can't handle anything.
School, parents, the future...
Ferris can do anything.
I don't know what I'm gonna do.
- College.
- Yeah. But to do what?
What are you interested in?
Nothing.
Me neither.
You're crazy!
What do you think Ferris is gonna do?
He's gonna be a fry cook at Venus.
Christ.
Poochie, poochie, poochie.
Look what Uncle Ed has for you,
you little fucker.
Jeez.
Sleep tight, pooch.
I knew it!
Well, where is she?
Look, this is her daughter.
Well, do you know where she is?
Do you know when she'll be back?
Do you know anything?
Ferris.
Bueller.
- Ha!
- Ya!
You're psychotic. You are, man.
You're out of your goddamn mind.
I can't believe you did that.
I can't believe you went
on a goddamn parade float!
Okay, okay, wait. No, okay, wait. Okay.
"Yeah, yeah. This tune is one of
my personal favorites."
You're out of your mind.
Do you realize
how many people saw you?
- You're nailed.
- No, no.
- You are. You're nailed.
- You are.
Who'd believe that I was in a parade?
Who the hell am I?
Besides, anybody who would nail me
wouldn't go to a parade.
- My mother would.
- I'm not worried about your mother.
That was so