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Pennsylvania Dutch, right?
Right.Till I bought a blow dryer, then I was shunned.
I-I used to be just like you.And then one day I saw a movie thatchanged my life.
Did you ever see Dead Poets' Society?Uh-huh.
I thought that movie was so incredibly
boring.I mean, that thing at the end where the kid kills himself because he can't be in the play?
What was that?!It's like, kid, wait a year, leave home, do some community theatre.
I walked out of there and I thought, 'Now, that's two hours of my life that I'm nevergetting back.'
And that thought scared me more than all the other crap I was afraid to do.
Wow.Then I would definitely not recommend Mrs. Doubtfire.
Oh God.
We didn't get into Scranton.
That was like our safety zoo.
They take like dogs and cows.
See?I don't know who this is harder on, me or him.
I'd say that chair's taking the brunt.
Marcel!Marcel! Marcel, no!
Good boy.
See, how can nobody want him?
Oh, somebody will.
You know there already is a Joseph Stalin?
You're kidding.
Apparently he was this Russian dictator who slaughtered all these people.
You'd think you would've known that!
Y'know, you'd think I would've.
Phoebe.Whaddyou think a good stage name for me would be?
...Flame Boy.
Where exactly is your zoo?Well, it's technically not a zoo per se, it's more of aninteractive wildlife experience.
Let me ask you some questions about, is it, uh, Marcel?
Yes.Does he, uh, fight with other animals?
No-no, he's, he's very docile.
Even if he were... cornered?
Well I, I don't know. Why?
Uh, how is he at handling small objects?
He can hold a banana, if that's whatcha mean
How about a hammer, or a small blade?
Why- why- why would he need a blade?
Well, if he's up against a jungle cat or an animal with horns,you've got to give the little guy something.
Otherwise it's just cruel.
He- he- he got in, he- he got in to San Diego.
We, we come back from our walk and the- the phone was ringing...He's in.
He's in!
Oh, did you hear that, Marcel?San Diego.San Diego!
You're making a big mistake here.I mean, San Diego's all well andgood, but if you give him to me,
I'll start him off against a blind rabbit and give youtwenty percent of the gains.
Yo- hooo!
Where the hell've you been?
Monica and I just crashed an embassy party.
Are you drunk?!Noooo!
I'm lying. I am so drunk.
Oh God, oh.
Great, Monica, y'know what, you could've called, I have beenup here, I've been worried...
Monica? Monica!
Water rules!
Yes, yes, it does.
Okay, look, the restaurant called, they wanna know ifyou're gonna be showing up for work?
Nope.
Going to the Big Apple Circus today.
Okay Monica, what are you doing?You're gonna lose your job!
This is notyou!
No, it is me!Y'know, I'm not just the person who needs to fluff thepillows and pay the bills as soon as they come in!
Y'know, when I'm with her, I am so muchmore than that. I'm-
I'm Monana!
Hello?
Yes, she is, hold on a second, please.
Monana, it's for you, the credit card people.
Helloooo? Yeah.
Oh my God. Thanks.
What?
They've arrested Monica.
Hi.Hey.
How are you?
I'm not too bad.Fortunately, blue's my colour. How-how did youknow I was here?
Because
I'm Monica Geller.
It was my credit card you were using.
That I was not expecting.
I want you to know, it wasn't me who turned you in.
Oh. Thanks.
No, thank you!You have given me so much! I mean, if it wasn't for you,
I would never have gotten to sing Memories on the stage at the WintergardenTheater!
Well, actually, you only got to sing 'Memo-'.
I just can't believe you're in here.I mean, what am I gonna do withoutyou?
Who's gonna crash the embassy parties with me? Who's gonna take me to the BigApple Circus?
Monica, I started my day by peeing in front of twenty-five otherwomen, and you're worried about who's gonna take you to the Big Apple Circus?
Well, not worried, just... wondering.
There's nothing to wonder about, Monica.
You're gonna go back to being exactly who you were, because that's who you
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