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and in some ways I think he is so right for me, it's just I hate that guy!
Hey, Joey. What's going on?Rachel Green.
Joey!! What the hell were you doing?!
Sorry. Wrong boobies.
Hello, Joey.Oh!
Hello, dear.The One With the Candy Heart
I'm tellin' you Ross, she wants you.
She barely knows me.We just live in the same building.
Any contact?
She lent me an egg once.
You're in!
Aw, right.
Hi, Ross.
Hey.
Come on, Ross, you gotta get back in the game here, ok?
The Rachel thing's not happening, your ex-wife is a lesbian, I don't think we need a third
Excuse me, could we get an egg over here, still in the shell?
Thanks. An egg?
Yeah, you're gonna go up to her and say, "Here's your egg back, I'm returning your egg."
I think it's winning.
I think it's insane.
She'll love it.
Go with the egg, my friend.
- Think it'll work?
- No, it's suicide. The man's got an egg.
You can not do this.
Do what, do what?
Roger wants to take her out tomorrow night.No!
Phoebes! Don't you remember why you dumped the guy?
'Cause he was creepy, and mean, and a little frightening alright,still, it's nice to have a date on Valentine's Day!
But Phoebe, you can go out with a creepy guy any night of the year.
I know I do.
Well, what are you guys doing tomorrow night?
Actually, tomorrow night kinda depends on how tonight goes.
Oh, uh, listen, about tonight...No, no, no, don't you dare bail on me.
The only reason she's goin' outwith me is because I said I could bring a friend for her friend.
Yes, I know, but her friend sounds like such a
Pathetic mess?I know, but—come on, man, she's needy, she'svulnerable.
I'm thinkin', cha-ching!
Thanks.
Look, you have not been out with a woman since Janice. You're doin'this.
Hi. She said yes.Yes!
Way to go, man!
Still got the egg, huh?
How do I look?Oh, uh, I don't...care.
Ok, now, remember,no trading.
You get the pretty one, I get the mess.
Hi, Joey.
Well well, look what you brought. Very nice.
...And what did you bring?
She's checking the coats.
Joey, I'm gonna go wash the cab smell off my hands.
Will you get me a white Zinfandel, and a glass of red for Janice.
Janice?
Oh.... my.... God.
Hey, it's Janice.
Ok, I'm makin' a break for it, I'm goin' out the window.
No, no, no, don't!
I've been waitin' for like, forever to go out withLorraine. Just calm down.
Calm down?Calm down? You set me up with the woman that I've dumpedtwice in the last five months!
Can you stop yellin'?You're makin' me nervous, and
I can't go when I'm nervous.
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, you're right.
Come on, do it, do it, go, come on!!!
Ok, ok, Roger was creepy, but he was nothing compared to Pete Carney.
Which one was Pete Carney?
Pete the Weeper?
Remember that guy who used to cry every time we hadsex.  "Was it good for you?"
Yeah, well, I'll take a little crying any day overHoward-the-"I-win"-guy."I win! I win!"
I went out withthe guy for two months—I didn't get to win once.
How did we end up with these jerks?
We're good people!I don't know.
Maybe we're some kinda magnets.I know I am.
That's why I can't wear a digital watch.
There's more beer, right?
Oh!
You know my friend Abby who shaves her head?
She said that if youwant to break the bad boyfriend cycle,
you can do like a cleansing ritual.
Pheebes, this woman is voluntarily bald.
Yeah.
So, we can do it tomorrow night, you guys.
It's Valentine's Day.It's perfect.
Ok, well, what kind of ritual?Ok.
We can, um, we can burn the stuff they gave us.
Or?
Or, or we can chant and dance around naked,you know, with sticks.
Burning's good.Burning's good.
Yeah, I got stuff to burn.
You know, ever since I was little,I've been able to pick up quarters with my toes.
Good for you.
Uh, quarters or rolls of quarters?
By the way, Chandler.I cut you out of all my pictures.So if you want,I have a bag with just your heads.
That's OK.
Oh, are you sure?Really? Because you know, you could make littlepuppets out of them, and you
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