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Third,
on these heights,
the Imperial architects had built
a marvelous ensemble,
which included a palace, a mosque,
a 1,200-bed harem,
and many other... similar delights.
Have you gone crazy?
Somethings wrong.
She wants me to go and see.
Hey, no, no, impossible!
- What does she want?
- I'll tell you later.
Lady, Senora, Frau, Miss,
its out of the question.
Russo turista, capito, moralita!
Verstehen? Thats it!
But what does she want?
We are most grateful to you. It was
a very interesting excursion.
Attention, please!
Now everyone will be on his own.
You can walk around the town.
But at five oclock sharp,
everyone must be back on board.
See you later.
Guesha! Why are you leaving me
in the lurch?
I didnt leave you. I was waiting.
Lets go this way.
Wheres he?
Dont worry,
hell come.
- The password is Damned melon?
- Damned melon.
Are you sure hes on the SS
Mikhail Svetlov?
We were assured that he was.
The ship is leaving in an hour!
Shut up!
Sorry, I guess I lost my temper.
You know...
Guesha!
Excuse me, Miss...
Damned melon!
Damned melon!
- Russo?
- Yes.
- Mikhail Svetlov?
- Yes, yes.
Damned melon.
Damned melon...
Whats wrong with him?
Its a very bad sprain.
Hes even lost consciousness.
Lets get down to work.
Damned melon! .
Mikhail Svetlov...
Damned melon!
Damned melon!
Russo?
Mikhail Svetlov?
Why didnt you use your brains?
But the other one gave the password
too. Damned melon.
There follows an untranslatable play
on words
with the use of local idiomatic
expressions.
Comrades, its time!
The ship leaves in half an hour!
Those idiots claimed
he was unconscious.
So the poor fool has no idea
whats going on.
Thats perfect!
Whats this?
Nothing. Just contraband items
someones trying to smuggle in.
Dont worry.
Calm down... Drink some of this.
I never touch the stuff.
Havent you read about it in House
and Home? Doctors recommend it.
It will calm your nervous system
and soothe your arteries.
Drink up.
Captain,
what do I do now?
Nothing.
Just have fun and relax.
But dont breathe a word to anyone
about that contraband stuff.
And if someone wants to know
what happened to my arm?
Say you slipped, fell down
and got a closed fracture.
You were knocked out, and when you
came to, it was already in a cast.
I slipped, fell down,
a closed fracture.
I was knocked out,
I came to-a plaster cast.
And dont worry,
Ill notify everyone concerned.
Thank you very much.
Dont you remember a thing?
Be careful!
- Why? I remember very well.
- You remember what?
I slipped...
got knocked out.
When I came to, I had this cast.
Thats all!
- I wish I fell instead of you.
- Thanks. Thats nice of you, Guesha.
Please, take care of your arm, Senya.
Nadia is going to be upset.
Thats cest la vie,
as Frenchmen say.
Im sorry, friend!
Are you finished? Must I go already?
Yes, move along, youre in the way.
- Youre through with me?
- Thats right.
Could it be that the Captain didnt
notify the customs? What do I do now?
There he is! The stuff is safe.
As safe as in a safe.
And the key?
To quote our chiefs immortal words,
Once a halfwit always a halfwit.
- I dont get it.
- Youll get it. Lets go to the chief!
Hands off me!
- Where are we going?
- Home.
So you had a look at some foreign
ports?
Yes, foreign ports.
Where should I go?
To the police? Or home?
This is the way home.
I didnt give him my address.
Wheres he taking me?
Theres just one road here
that goes into the city.
I want to go to Morskaya Street,
number 21, apartment 9.
entrance three, third floor.
Whats wrong with your arm?
Why is he interested in my arm?
He looks suspicious.
I slipped, fell down, got knocked out,
came to already in a cast.
Excuse me, youre an amateur actor,
arent you?
Yes, thats right.
Why did I lie to him?
Why did he ask me?
Hes trying to get information from
me. He looks more and more

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