beyond smart.
It's weird.
You know what's really weird?
I don't think
he's drooling anymore.
That's weird.
- Is it Thanksgiving?
- Of course not, Maddy. Why?
Because we're all
eating together.
Maddy, that's a good one.
But, you know,
I think inappropriate.
Say you're sorry, honey.
Sorry, Mom.
I just thought it would be nice for us all
to have a typical Sedgefood family meal.
Oh, Reg, did I tell you
that fur company we picketed closed?
Mm-hmm. I know.
We owned it.
How could we?
It's against everything we believe in.
We just acquired it
a few years ago.
I could have had free furs
all this time, and you never told me?
- Martha, you're against fur.
- Yeah, now, but I didn't used to be!
De-fatted, unsalted,
cholesterol-free,
organic porcine pot roast.
Was it free-range?
It was a pig, ma'am.
I'm not sure how far
they'd actually go...
if they were given
free range.
Maybe just the semolina,
faux meat patty, then, Simmons.
- As you wish, ma'am.
- Oops.
Sorry.
Michelangelo, would you be so kind
as to get that napkin?
Michelangelo.
Michelangelo, no.
Get back! Get back!
Ohh!
Oh! Simmons!
That wasn't the Bella, was it?
My God. That's gonna leave a mark.
Okay.
One foot in front of the other.
There we go.
Steady up.
Just don't stand there,
Simmons, for heaven's sake!
Get the pot roast away from him!
He'll break out in hives!
Hmm.
Michelangelo?
I was having a bad dream.
Did I wake you?
Hey, want to come
sleep with me?
Come on.
Come on. Yeah.
Okay.
Let's see who's done
their homework.
How about my little obstacle course
buddy? Drop the leash, son.
Um, I-I don't think that's
such a good idea, sir.
Last week, due to circumstances
beyond my control,
I was unable to tell you all
the commands you will be learning...
- in this class.
- Brennan!
Commands such as "sit,"
"down,"
"come"...
and, of course, "heel. "
And, therefore, in order
to test your dog's skills,
my wife, Florence Rutledge,
has lovingly designed...
the obstacle course,
which represents
real-life situations...
you and your canine
might actually encounter...
in real life.
The tunnel, one of
the more difficult trials,
which only 1 in 100 untrained dogs
can successfully negotiate.
The "A"frame, perhaps a dangerous
sand dune at the beach...
on a busy summer day,
kids screaming everywhere!
Can you trust your canine
not to bolt into the crowd...
and make off with
a three-year-old kid for lunch?
The double jump,
perhaps...
your neighbor's hedge,...over which your dog
might have to hurtle...
to save you from a...
eh... cat.
It's happened before.
The teeter, a lot like...
well, I'm not sure
about that one,
but Florence like teeters,
so she put it in.
And, of course,
the suspended foam donut.
Absolutely impossible for amateurs
to negotiate without proper training.
So don't even try it.
Yes, people, it's not
going to happen overnight.
But with a lot
of hard work and patience,
even a dog who's two bones short
of a stew will learn to obey.
And before this class
is over, big guy,
you will be trained
so well...
that you will execute
each and every obstacle...
as if it were
a walk in the park.
I promise you that.
Dismissed!
Ladies, your attention,
please, to the podium.
Thank you.
Ladies,
you are invited here today...
because you've all
been in the forefront...
in your concern
for the environment...
and your willingness to embrace
new methods of conservation.
The idea of drinking toilet water
is a new one, to be sure,
but it's the wave
of the future!
Hey!
Come on, ladies.
Don't be shy.
- Bottoms up, so to speak!
- Here we go!
Ahh!
- I can do this.
- Lauren, you want to go play in my room?
- I got ya!
- Whoa!
Stop! Stop!
- Michelangelo!
- You're coming with me!
What are you doing?
Stop! Stop it!
What are you doing?
Aaah!
Heel!
Michelangelo, stop!
Whoa-oa-oa!
Oh, no.
Oh, no!
Whoa! Whoa!
Whoa! Whoa!
Oh, dear, madam.
You're all