neighbor's hedge.
Over which your dog might have to hurtle
to save you from a...
...black cat.
It's happened before. The teeter.
A lot like, well,
I'm not sure about that one.
Florence likes teeters, so she put it in.
And of course, the suspended foam donut.
Impossible for amateurs to negotiate
without proper training.
Don't even try it.
Yes, people,
it's not going to happen overnight.
But with a lot of hard work and patience...
...even a dog who's two bones short
of a stew...
...will learn to obey.
And...
...before this class is over...
...big guy...
...you will be trained so well...
...that you will execute
each and every obstacle...
...as if it were a walk in the park.
I promise you that.
Dismissed!
ANNOUNCER: Your attention please
to the podium. Thank you.
MARTHA: Ladies...
...you were invited here today...
...because you've been at the forefront
in your concern for the environment...
...and your willingness to embrace
new methods of conservation.
The idea of drinking toilet water
is a new one to be sure.
But it's the wave of the future!
Come on, ladies, don't be shy.
Bottoms up, so to speak.
MADISON: Stop!
Stop!
Michelangelo, what are you doing?
Stop it, heel!
What are you doing?
[Screaming]
MADISON: Heel!
Michelangelo, stop!
Oh, no.
No!
[Fast-paced instrumental music]
Come here, madam, you're all wet!
Michelangelo, stay! Heel!
Crikey!
My God!
He's having an anxiety attack!
Come here, got you.
That went well, didn't it? ldiot.
[Barks]
Shut up, haven't you done enough?
Come on.
MARTHA: You have no idea
how traumatic it was, Doctor.
The deeply buried feelings
that dredged up--
[Gasps]
I just had a flash.
Do you think I had issues
with potty training when I was a child?
Mrs. Sedgwick, would you please sit up?
This is Michelangelo's appointment.
Of course.
I see there's a lot of hostility today.
MARTHA: That's just it, Doctor.
All that hostility, all that acting out.
It's all so sudden.
Where is it coming from?
-Do you want to know what I think?
-Of course.
I think Michelangelo
is reacting to a lack of affection.
Well, that's ridiculous.
I'm fairly sure
my daughter gives him affection.
-You're "fairly sure"?
-Well, I've seen them together.
Do you give Michelangelo affection?
Physical affection.
-I try to give him his space.
-What about your daughter?
-Well, I told you, I'm fairly sure--
-No, no.
I mean,
do you give your daughter affection?
Dr. Brothers, as you pointed out,
this is Michelangelo's appointment.
DR. BROTHERS: Mrs. Sedgwick, I think
the problem is deeper than Michelangelo.
He's merely the first one
to exhibit symptoms.
-What are you writing now?
-Notes for my new book.
When you people fell out of the stupid tree,
you hit every branch on the way down.
SARA: Heel.
Good boy.
Sit.
Brennan, look! Can you believe this?
I don't know what it is.
My dog just can't seem to learn anything.
I wish he was more like Beethoven.
Well, it didn't just happen overnight.
You just, you know, gotta keep at it...
...and eventually it'll all come together.
You just gotta...
...be patient, mostly,
and a lot of hard work and stuff.
Thanks.
-Well, I gotta go.
-I gotta go, too.
-Okay, 'bye.
-'Bye.
-'Bye.
-I guess I'll see you later, then.
BRENNAN: It's just incredible, that's all.
Top student in the class.
A beautiful girl likes me.
-It doesn't work that way in high school.
-Are you worried about Beethoven?
Real worried...
...he'll turn me into such a babe magnet,
I won't have time to eat or sleep.
Brennan, I mean it.
Beethoven's not the same dog
he used to be.
What are you talking about?
I mean, all our problems are over.
Beethoven's finally learning how to obey.
Mom's cooled off about
sending him off to some farm.